Believe it or not, this 'stupid video post' actually does have something to do with what I'm learning in college. I'm almost done with fall quarter, and am about to have the time to share my more serious articles, and even other schoolwork.
` But, for now, I thought, just to update this blog if nothing else, something of a less serious nature.
You see, October 19, 2010 was the best day ever of my life, because I had just gone through a childhood developmental stage attained by most people at 2 1/2 years old, thus acquiring some more efficient brain-processing skills. Unfortunately, my life quickly went downhill for other reasons despite this (i.e. I got the flu, my favorite cat died, etc).
` On the best day ever, however, I remembered having seen on YouTube the title, 'Spongebob Squarepants -- The Best Day Ever', so I found the 'sing-along' version on YouTube, which featured such strange sights as Spongebob with an oversized butt flying through the water, leaving behind a rainbow trail.
'Dare I speculate?' I thought, having never actually seen the show.
However, in the sidebar, I noticed another title, 'Bob Esponja -- El Mejor de Los Dias'! This Bob Esponja sounded eerily similar to Spongebob, but it was in Spanish-Spanish, that is, the kind of Spanish spoken in Spain. (The most noticeable feature is the pronunciation of 'c' and 'z' as a 'th' sound.)
` This one wasn't a sing-along video, it only had still pictures, and also the song was different because it only consisted of the first verse and then had a bunch of dialogue.
` I thought it might be fun to try to translate the dialogue, but it would help if I could see what was going on. It would also help if I had the Spanish lyrics, but when I looked them up online, they did not match the ones I'd heard!
And then, I found out why:
I was going around YouTube, looking for a version that shows the original video and came across a completely different translation of exactly the same song, in a different key, as sung by a much different-sounding Bob Esponja -- this one with a Latin American accent!
I later looked this up on Wikipedia -- sure enough, there are both a Spanish and a Latin American version of Bob Esponja! I don't know why that is, but it is.
The first thing that popped into my head was, 'Great! Now I can listen to both and compare the two and from that, figure out what they're saying!' You know, kind of like the idea behind deciphering the Rosetta stone, but with Bob Esponjas.
Amazingly, I managed, with the power of listening intently, to figure out that he was talking to his pet snail, who I knew was like a cat, about the new generation of Crab-burgers, fishing for jellyfish with Patricio (whom at least I knew must be the sea star, Patrick), having a karate session with 'Arenita', whom I figured must be the squirrel in the diving suit, and then going to the clarinet recital of 'Calamardo' whom I figured must be a squid.
That's seriously all I knew. I felt lost in this pursuit, however, so I decided to go around YouTube, watching videos, and was able to confirm that much of this made sense. As for the show, I didn't know quite what to make of it.
` And then, I saw the chocolate-selling scene with the dried-up old lady! "You just can't wait for me to die, can you?" It was wrong on so many levels...
Hooray for lying! This, of course, convinced me to start viewing the show on Netflix, which we had just subscribed to at the time. Importantly, I decided to use my newfound mental skills to analyze it as TV shows are meant to be analyzed!
I liked the way the characters play off one another, especially the way that Spongebob and Patrick so greatly annoy the sarcastic Squidward (Calamardo) the bald, middle-aged, self-absorbed, curmudgeonly octopus (i.e. not actually a squid) who fancies himself to be an artistic genius trapped in a dead-end job, and who secretly wants to join in their silly games because they're so happy, despite being innocent and lacking in intelligence, while he's not.
` I also quickly figured out that the stupidity seen in the show is not the punchline -- it's the way they make fun of the stupidity. The inappropriate wholesomeness reminded me of the very twisted Strangers With Candy series (about a graying former prostitute back in high school), whereas the parts with fast-paced flashbacks reminded me of Family Guy, and then the weird tangential stuff was reminiscent of Monty Python. Other parts were... well... more special. In a short bus sort of way.
My mental health will never be the same.
Anyway, the show did help me translate what was going on in the songs. And do you want to know what I came up with? Well, I think I did fairly well, considering I'm only in Spanish Level 2 and haven't even formally learned the future tense. Of course, my instructor also helped me, but still, I got most of it by myself, even parts she couldn't understand!
So, I'll present the Spanish-from-Spain translation first, along with the Latin American Spanish version, so you can actually listen, if you dare:
Ya ha salido el sol sólo para mí
The sun has come up just for me
?? Qué día va a ser tengo que salir
What a day it's going to be, I have to go out
Saltar al fin de felicidad
To jump, at last, for joy
Es lo que tu descubrirás
It is what you will discover,
!Todos es especialo! (!Este ya!)
Everything is special (This already!)
¡Ey, Gary!
Hi, Gary!
?Mrao?
Mrao?
Te preguntarás por que es el mejor dia a mi vida?
You would ask why it's the best day of my life?
Porque, Gary, voy a ?? este maravilloso día trayendo al mundo a toda
Because, Gary, I'm going to ?begin this marvelous day bringing to the whole world
una nueva generación de deliciosas ?burgers Cangreburgers!
a new generation of delicious ?burgers Krabby Patties
Seguida ?? una vigorizante sesión de karate con Arenita al mediodía,
It continues ?with an invigorating session of karate with Sandy at noon,
Y una tarde de caza de medusas con Patrício donde estrena mi
And an afternoon of catching? jellyfish with Patrick where he'll first use my
poseción más prefiere y nueva ¡El caze medusa profesionál de lujo!
most preferred and new posession; the profesional deluxe jellyfish hunter!
Y por el gran final, ¡todos mis amigos más intimos
And for the grand finale, all my best friends
nos reuniremos para el recital la clarinete de Calimardo!
(we) will come together for Squidward's clarinet recital!
¡Estoy tan emocionado que creo que voy a explotarrrr!
I'm so excited that I think that I'm going to explode!
¡Todos es especialooo! (¡Este ya!)
Everything is special-o! (This already!)
I don't know what 'especialo' means, but whatever -- if any Spanish-speaker would like to comment on my translations, it'd be great.
` Oh yes, that's right -- translations-plural!: If that wasn't enough for you, here's the Latin American version, which is slower and easier to understand, and thus a huge help in translating the Spanish-Spanish version:
El sol ha salido y me ha sonreído
The sun has come up and has smiled at me
Que sería buen día me ha prometido
What a good day it will be, promised to me!
Salté de la cama con mucha alegría
Jumped out of bed with much happiness
Sintiéndome cómo nunca y
I'm feeling like never before, and
¡El mejor día es! (Best day ever!)
It's the best day! (Best day ever!)
!Hola, Gary!
Hello, Gary!
?Mrao?
Mrao?
?Preguntas por que es mejor dia?
You ask why it's the best day?
Porque Gary, comenzaré este maravilloso día dando vida a
Because, Gary, this marvelous day will begin giving life to
una nueva generación de deliciosas Cangreburgers!
a new generation of delicious Krabby Patties!
Seguida por una vigorosa sessión de karate con Arenita
It continues for a vigorous session of karate with Sandy
Y una tarde pescando medusas con Patricio donde revelaré
And an afternoon jellyfishing with Patrick where I'll reveal
mi más ?presciente preciosada posesión; el atrapa-medusas de lujo profesional
My most ?prescient precious posession; the deluxe professional jellyfish trap!
Y para el gran final, iré con mis mejores amigos
And for the grand finale, I'll go with my best friends
a presenciniar recital de clarineta de Calamardo
to be present at Squidward's clarinet recital!
Estoy tan emocionado yo creo que voy a explotaaar!
I'm so excited I think I'm going to explode!
El mejor dia eeeessss! (Best day ever!)
It's the best day ever!
And right when I was putting my paper together, I happened to go on YouTube (yes, for research purposes!) and I actually found the English version of this song, with the same dialogue -- it's actually just the beginning of an episode.
` Unfortunately, it was taken down the day after, but while it lasted, I wrote down what's in the original video:
Mister Sun came up and he smiled at me!
(The sun actually comes through his window with a -- ARRRGH! -- hideously cute smile!)
Said, It's gonna be a good one, just wait and see!
(Awkward pause where Spongebob and the sun stare at each other, then then Spongebob's bed GOES UP IN FLAMES, and Spongebob escapes the creepy underwater sun's fire just in time, and goes running around on the outside of his pineapple house.)
Jumped out of bed, and I ran outside, feeling so extra-ecstatified!
It's the best day ever! (Best day ever!)
(Spongebob find his pet snail on the roof and says,) "Hey, Gary!"
(Gary says,) "Mrao?"
(We can see what Spongebob is thinking via the magic of thought balloons.) "Why is it the best day ever, you ask? Because, Gary, I get to start this wonderful day bringing life to a whole new generation of delicious Krabby Patties! Followed by a vigorous midday session of karate with Sandy! And an afternoon jellyfishing with Patrick, where I'll unveil my newest, most prized posession, the Deluxe Jellyslayer Composite Pro!" (Spongebob demonstrates its capturing powers on Gary.)
"And, for the grand finale, every one of my closest friends joining together for Squidward's clarinet recital! I am so excited I think I'm going to explode!" (Gary backs away for safety purposes.)
Spongebob explodes and keeps singing, "It's the best day everrr!" while dorking it up along his way to work, and he is in such a good mood that he fails to notice that his workplace is covered in yellow tape that says 'Condemned' and giggles like a moron when he puts his hand on the doorknob.
` The video ends before we see his reaction -- well, I wanna see the rest! Better order some more Spongebob!
While the good-quality English language version of that video is down, I at least found a bad quality Latin American Spanish version of it... at least you can see what I was talking about.
Anyway, translating this all was indeed one of my Spanish projects this quarter. I hope it was... uh... special enough for you.
And if you think this was a horrible idea for a post, just remember that part of the reason I like Spongebob is because I went to Retard School and I have a tendency to love laughing at retards.
In any case, I have my Spanish class to blame!
Yeah, I'm blaming it on my education!
Hey... wait a second!
I just remembered, I left out one of my favorite characters. He's into world domination, like me -- it's Plankton, the one-eyed copepod! He also has an A.I., his computer wife, Karen, and a secret lab at the Chum Bucket, a restaurant nobody goes to because the food is that bad!
` Unfortunately, most of the Spongebob clips on YouTube are really not worth watching, so this was the best I could do:
Here's what happens when Plankton tries to be buddies with Spongebob -- of course, he's actually after Mr. Krabs' secret Krabby Patty recipe... but what they don't know is that Mr. Krabs is watching!
F is for Fire that burns down the whole town,
U is for Uranium bombs,
N is for No survivors...
Spongebob is such a moron, it hurts, and it hurts so much that I have that tingly sensation... no, it shouldn't stop!
Uhhhh....
This reminds me, I'll need to be getting back into gear for world domination soon. Be expecting that.
And, as a reward for making it all the way down to the bottom, I also found a video that reminds me of the Good Ol' (not really) Ghetto Days. Here's three short episodes of what Spongebob Squarepants would be like if all the characters came from the crackhouse I used to live at!
Are you ready, stoners? Ooooohhhhh... (cough! cough!) hold on, 'kay? Oooooohhhh, who lives in a bong in a dormitory?
SpongeBong HempPants
Disgusting and green and sticky is he....
Yes, for real!
I'm so sorry if this post is lame. Which it isn't. But if it were lame, I would apologize.
Ahhhh, I'm feeling more like myself now!
Well, I must be on my way. Finally, I'll have a real post next. But which one? There are so many to choose from by now....
Showing posts with label Strangely Pleasant. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Strangely Pleasant. Show all posts
Tuesday, December 07, 2010
Thursday, February 25, 2010
My improbable scheme...
You know, I've thought it was strange that I've been using this as a place to tell everyone about the photo updates for my mild-mannered exterior, and now I think I understand why:
` I've been dealing with crisis after crisis from living in the same house as so many psychotic people and drug addicts and all kinds of crazy situations! I've been having to guard my lab, and all of my important secret stuff has been in storage!
So this is it! I've found a novel, new use for this blog... my originally-intended purpose!
Irony! I mean, I'm a struggling mad scientist, my frontal lobes have been working inconsistently for the past few years, but now they seem to be working well enough for introspection, not to mention plotting my world-domination!
Indeed, my unwilling subjects, I am finally going to go back to being a mad scientist here. I don't know what I'll be doing. It's been years since my creative juices have gotten a hold on my brain, but I'll think of something.
One thing that does help is this song I've got stuck in my head, as sung by a certain lab mouse who is hell-bent on taking over the world.
What I will be doing, I'm not sure yet. But rest assured, I will be hard at work. Just like Brain....
As for the photo updates I will continue them on the Science, Wackmobiles and Spurious Brainchildren blog, together with my milk-mannered journal updates: The latest journal/photo update is here.
I'll be back with something... worse... or better?
` I've been dealing with crisis after crisis from living in the same house as so many psychotic people and drug addicts and all kinds of crazy situations! I've been having to guard my lab, and all of my important secret stuff has been in storage!
So this is it! I've found a novel, new use for this blog... my originally-intended purpose!
Irony! I mean, I'm a struggling mad scientist, my frontal lobes have been working inconsistently for the past few years, but now they seem to be working well enough for introspection, not to mention plotting my world-domination!
Indeed, my unwilling subjects, I am finally going to go back to being a mad scientist here. I don't know what I'll be doing. It's been years since my creative juices have gotten a hold on my brain, but I'll think of something.
One thing that does help is this song I've got stuck in my head, as sung by a certain lab mouse who is hell-bent on taking over the world.
To scheme the improbable scheme,
To plan the unthinkable plan,
To build when your arms are too tiny,
To walk in the suit of a man!
This is my fate, to conquer the earth!
To play with the big boys, though I lack the girth,
To reach for the stars, on a whim or a dare,
I could climb to the top if I only could reach the first stair!
And the world doesn't know what they'll miss
If a mouse doesn't follow his dream,
To scrawl with his last bit of graphite,
To scheme, the improbable scheme!
To plan the unthinkable plan,
To build when your arms are too tiny,
To walk in the suit of a man!
This is my fate, to conquer the earth!
To play with the big boys, though I lack the girth,
To reach for the stars, on a whim or a dare,
I could climb to the top if I only could reach the first stair!
And the world doesn't know what they'll miss
If a mouse doesn't follow his dream,
To scrawl with his last bit of graphite,
To scheme, the improbable scheme!
What I will be doing, I'm not sure yet. But rest assured, I will be hard at work. Just like Brain....
As for the photo updates I will continue them on the Science, Wackmobiles and Spurious Brainchildren blog, together with my milk-mannered journal updates: The latest journal/photo update is here.
I'll be back with something... worse... or better?
Saturday, May 23, 2009
Wow. The stuff just keeps happening!
Okay, I haven't done this in a while. It's a good recollection for me of all the crap we were going through before the move, so I can look back on it and say "Ah! Glad to be out of there!"
` So here's the last days of March and some of April, and though there are no photos up here, you can view some of them in my Facebook's April 2009 photo album!
No, I'm not addicted to Facebook. You can see that.
Why does stuff stop working when I use it? Do I just break stuff because I'm me?
I did tons of housework this morning while a cool worker, Roma, took the new shower in the master bathroom (the old shower is also still there!) out of the wall so he could make water spring forth from it. Imagine that! A shower which sprays water!
When it came close to leaving-for-school-time, I spent 25 minutes looking for my water bottle and didn't find it. Still got to Surviving the Holocaust class early (Holocausts are important to survive!) and discovered... separate desks in a classroom?!
Then I found Stephen - I mean TallGuy - who helped me out by holding onto my bag while I went into the bookstore so that it didn't have to be sealed by the security officer.
I had to get 8 books for the Holocaust class, but they didn't cost much.
Then I got to math class, on time. ALEKS is such a cool program. I love it.
Got home and found my water bottle (of course!) and the missing page of my screenplay, which had somehow gotten blown into our bathroom where Roma was working, and he somehow put it on top of an empty box and then put another box on top of it so it was squashed down inside. Jeezus! Leave my screenplay unattended near a stranger and it goes from being with the rest of my stuff to in the midst of a trash heap!
` The brightly-colored cardboard cat carriers, unfortunately, went from being in perfect brand-new condition to crumpled and torn up.
While I'd been gone today, Lou Ryan took a man named Patrick, who came to fix something in our main bathroom, on a tour of our house and explained everything that was going on. He said; "You know what she told me? That you're bad tenants who are kicking holes in the wall, and we're here to fix the damage."
` Now, that is such a Mind-Boggling Lie that I am betting it is only crazy enough to befit a landlady.
I was almost done with homework when I got interrupted by Lou Ryan, who told me to go to bed, and I did.
So, Roma is back, to finish up the shitty work. We also got to kick C.L. out of the house.
I went to do some math on the computer, but the computer turned off and wouldn't come back on because the button for turning on the UPS is stuck in the off position. But now, with music blasting through the house, there isn't much chance for me to finish the homework I'd started last night.
What happened today while I was at school: Crazy Landlady brought her little church friend to help repair what was supposed to have been a basement kitchen. We were supposedly the 'mean, criminal tenants' and she was the 'poor fretting landlady', and B-Gangsta got down there and said, "we haven't been able to use this space the entire time we've lived here, but we've been paying full rent. You are a thief!" and the church friend knew what was going on and he refused to help.
So, the shower has been re-installed so that it works this time, except now it's dripping.
` Fixed the computer UPS though - the button was stuck and wouldn't come on. Watched Trekkies on it with my free rental.
Didn't realize Trekkies was being showed IN CLASS! I could have been doing something else.
It was raining like hell when I got home. The first thing I did was answer the cat when she said something to me in 'mommy I'm glad you're home' talk. It was almost dark, fish tank trickling sounds echoing through the hall, drowning out the sound of the stereo blasting in the basement. First thing I do as usual when I come home is put water in the fish tank. IT IS FUCKING LOUD.
` The kitchen, of course, is a mess and all I can do to get it that way is not be there and it happens magically. THis morning I had pancakes and coffe and washed my plates and there weren't piles of dirty dishes everywhere - now there are.
` Then I went into the basement and turned the stereo off. No one else was home.
Vada talked a lot with me, but where is Violet? Locked in the computer room, really cold as it is at least once a day because the window is always left open when I'm not around to shut it, so I did. Well, time to clean up the kitchen and start on my homework.
Went to Johnny's concert. HE ROCKED! The other guys were not rocking out - the one guy's guitar was constantly blaring out feedback because he was so timidly picking at the strings.
After watching Night and Fog in class, I met Nymphomaniac in the Gray Wolf building. She convinced me to have a birthday party - today is my birthday - and we had to move because a bulletin board was being put up. It will be finished soon!
` Came home to a birthday check, bought gas, strawberries, yogurt, etc. And then... there was tons of food at home, including a CAKE. And a balloon attached to my cats, and some chocolates! Then we fired up the barbecue.
My smoothie plans went perfectly- peaches, strawberries, rehydrated cherries (since last night) and even honeydew and yogurt... until I was pouring it into a cup and Lucas was standing way too close to me with Violet in his arms, when he bumped me and I yelped and spilled it and Violet just about tore his nipple off. Of course I was repremanded for the screaming.
Re-calling the people who didn't answer their phones last night. Mmm, smoothie.
Pictures of Gray Wolf inaguration.
People were over! They came, they conquered, then went. I tried to make Harlan feel bad about not coming via phone molestation.
` We had the pizza, asparagus and cheese, and was much rejoicing and they were going to spank me but because someone was watching Wolf and it was audible house-wide, we wound up watching it.
` Timmy fixed the computer! Roma fixed the shower leak, too!
` Crazy Landlady's former insurance agent and former tenants also came over today.
Today I woke up to sunlight and the sound of mucus rolling in my sinuses very loudly. Because I wake up when I snore. Started cleaning the kitchen, sun is glowing through the mist. Immediately got up, ejected so much mucus as possible, in pretty colors, and started laundry.
` Was taken on a nice walk that went a little too long - now to face the fact that I'm behind in homework.
Had a long converstaion with TallGuy at school, while drying my shorts taht had been attacked by an exploding water bottle.
Woke up before my alarm went off when Lucas coughed a huge loogie in my mouth! Then went to school and discussed that I am way overqualified for Mensa.
It's so cute how Vada is destroying a mosquito killed on the inside of the sliding glass doors whilst Violet paws at it in vain from outside the glass!
Hung out with Nympho, we proposed our own Nine Foot Nation and it sown language, etc, and went to the Food Bank. Also, I saw Stephen on a bus, so I called him and saw him suddenly reach for his bag, but he didn't answer his phone, then called back later and told me he couldn't even hear his phone ringing!
I'm at the gym, preparing for Zippy's - Justin walked by the gym, but didn't come in, and instead left me an answering message that he's rally busy.
What a time at Zippys'! Zippy was there, and HairyGuy, Jesus, Adam, Nympho, Xenophon, Cheshire Human and Flinch.
` Interesting time as usual with Xeno afterwards on the sidewalk. I noticed that Cheshire was bummed out, so I decided to stay perhaps an hour just to console her. She was bummed because she got rejected by two people. As we were walking to my car we saw Lucas, Johnny and Matty at this club by Tony V's (Formerly Jimmy Z's) called Haley's. Lucas was pisssed because he got stood up by a musician he was supposed to meet, so he playd his guitar for us a minute, then went inside and we went on our way. By the time we were several blocks away he called me and asked where we'd gone!
` We'd gone to my car by then. After that, it was onto Denny's, where we checked to see who was there, then I drove her home. As for Lucas, the guy did show up, and he was a horrible jerk so Lucas left.
So now I'm folding the laundry that I did earlier today and Johnny and Matty are at it again. "What are you gonna tell my family if I die?" Johnny said: "Matty's gone, baby, we're in the clear!"
` As for a eulogy for Matty: "He was a crackhead and a puto." Uproarious laughter is the only good part about their constant bickering.
Wow, I'm glad he's out of the picture. Anyway, I have to get back to the real world. The rest of it later. Ciao!
` So here's the last days of March and some of April, and though there are no photos up here, you can view some of them in my Facebook's April 2009 photo album!
No, I'm not addicted to Facebook. You can see that.
March 30, Monday
Why does stuff stop working when I use it? Do I just break stuff because I'm me?
I did tons of housework this morning while a cool worker, Roma, took the new shower in the master bathroom (the old shower is also still there!) out of the wall so he could make water spring forth from it. Imagine that! A shower which sprays water!
When it came close to leaving-for-school-time, I spent 25 minutes looking for my water bottle and didn't find it. Still got to Surviving the Holocaust class early (Holocausts are important to survive!) and discovered... separate desks in a classroom?!
Then I found Stephen - I mean TallGuy - who helped me out by holding onto my bag while I went into the bookstore so that it didn't have to be sealed by the security officer.
I had to get 8 books for the Holocaust class, but they didn't cost much.
Then I got to math class, on time. ALEKS is such a cool program. I love it.
Got home and found my water bottle (of course!) and the missing page of my screenplay, which had somehow gotten blown into our bathroom where Roma was working, and he somehow put it on top of an empty box and then put another box on top of it so it was squashed down inside. Jeezus! Leave my screenplay unattended near a stranger and it goes from being with the rest of my stuff to in the midst of a trash heap!
` The brightly-colored cardboard cat carriers, unfortunately, went from being in perfect brand-new condition to crumpled and torn up.
While I'd been gone today, Lou Ryan took a man named Patrick, who came to fix something in our main bathroom, on a tour of our house and explained everything that was going on. He said; "You know what she told me? That you're bad tenants who are kicking holes in the wall, and we're here to fix the damage."
` Now, that is such a Mind-Boggling Lie that I am betting it is only crazy enough to befit a landlady.
I was almost done with homework when I got interrupted by Lou Ryan, who told me to go to bed, and I did.
March 31, Tuesday
So, Roma is back, to finish up the shitty work. We also got to kick C.L. out of the house.
I went to do some math on the computer, but the computer turned off and wouldn't come back on because the button for turning on the UPS is stuck in the off position. But now, with music blasting through the house, there isn't much chance for me to finish the homework I'd started last night.
What happened today while I was at school: Crazy Landlady brought her little church friend to help repair what was supposed to have been a basement kitchen. We were supposedly the 'mean, criminal tenants' and she was the 'poor fretting landlady', and B-Gangsta got down there and said, "we haven't been able to use this space the entire time we've lived here, but we've been paying full rent. You are a thief!" and the church friend knew what was going on and he refused to help.
So, the shower has been re-installed so that it works this time, except now it's dripping.
` Fixed the computer UPS though - the button was stuck and wouldn't come on. Watched Trekkies on it with my free rental.
April 1, Wednesday
Didn't realize Trekkies was being showed IN CLASS! I could have been doing something else.
It was raining like hell when I got home. The first thing I did was answer the cat when she said something to me in 'mommy I'm glad you're home' talk. It was almost dark, fish tank trickling sounds echoing through the hall, drowning out the sound of the stereo blasting in the basement. First thing I do as usual when I come home is put water in the fish tank. IT IS FUCKING LOUD.
` The kitchen, of course, is a mess and all I can do to get it that way is not be there and it happens magically. THis morning I had pancakes and coffe and washed my plates and there weren't piles of dirty dishes everywhere - now there are.
` Then I went into the basement and turned the stereo off. No one else was home.
Vada talked a lot with me, but where is Violet? Locked in the computer room, really cold as it is at least once a day because the window is always left open when I'm not around to shut it, so I did. Well, time to clean up the kitchen and start on my homework.
Went to Johnny's concert. HE ROCKED! The other guys were not rocking out - the one guy's guitar was constantly blaring out feedback because he was so timidly picking at the strings.
April 2
After watching Night and Fog in class, I met Nymphomaniac in the Gray Wolf building. She convinced me to have a birthday party - today is my birthday - and we had to move because a bulletin board was being put up. It will be finished soon!
` Came home to a birthday check, bought gas, strawberries, yogurt, etc. And then... there was tons of food at home, including a CAKE. And a balloon attached to my cats, and some chocolates! Then we fired up the barbecue.
April 3, Firday
My smoothie plans went perfectly- peaches, strawberries, rehydrated cherries (since last night) and even honeydew and yogurt... until I was pouring it into a cup and Lucas was standing way too close to me with Violet in his arms, when he bumped me and I yelped and spilled it and Violet just about tore his nipple off. Of course I was repremanded for the screaming.
Re-calling the people who didn't answer their phones last night. Mmm, smoothie.
Pictures of Gray Wolf inaguration.
People were over! They came, they conquered, then went. I tried to make Harlan feel bad about not coming via phone molestation.
` We had the pizza, asparagus and cheese, and was much rejoicing and they were going to spank me but because someone was watching Wolf and it was audible house-wide, we wound up watching it.
` Timmy fixed the computer! Roma fixed the shower leak, too!
` Crazy Landlady's former insurance agent and former tenants also came over today.
April 4, 2009
Today I woke up to sunlight and the sound of mucus rolling in my sinuses very loudly. Because I wake up when I snore. Started cleaning the kitchen, sun is glowing through the mist. Immediately got up, ejected so much mucus as possible, in pretty colors, and started laundry.
` Was taken on a nice walk that went a little too long - now to face the fact that I'm behind in homework.
April 7
Had a long converstaion with TallGuy at school, while drying my shorts taht had been attacked by an exploding water bottle.
April 8
Woke up before my alarm went off when Lucas coughed a huge loogie in my mouth! Then went to school and discussed that I am way overqualified for Mensa.
April 9
It's so cute how Vada is destroying a mosquito killed on the inside of the sliding glass doors whilst Violet paws at it in vain from outside the glass!
Hung out with Nympho, we proposed our own Nine Foot Nation and it sown language, etc, and went to the Food Bank. Also, I saw Stephen on a bus, so I called him and saw him suddenly reach for his bag, but he didn't answer his phone, then called back later and told me he couldn't even hear his phone ringing!
I'm at the gym, preparing for Zippy's - Justin walked by the gym, but didn't come in, and instead left me an answering message that he's rally busy.
What a time at Zippys'! Zippy was there, and HairyGuy, Jesus, Adam, Nympho, Xenophon, Cheshire Human and Flinch.
` Interesting time as usual with Xeno afterwards on the sidewalk. I noticed that Cheshire was bummed out, so I decided to stay perhaps an hour just to console her. She was bummed because she got rejected by two people. As we were walking to my car we saw Lucas, Johnny and Matty at this club by Tony V's (Formerly Jimmy Z's) called Haley's. Lucas was pisssed because he got stood up by a musician he was supposed to meet, so he playd his guitar for us a minute, then went inside and we went on our way. By the time we were several blocks away he called me and asked where we'd gone!
` We'd gone to my car by then. After that, it was onto Denny's, where we checked to see who was there, then I drove her home. As for Lucas, the guy did show up, and he was a horrible jerk so Lucas left.
So now I'm folding the laundry that I did earlier today and Johnny and Matty are at it again. "What are you gonna tell my family if I die?" Johnny said: "Matty's gone, baby, we're in the clear!"
` As for a eulogy for Matty: "He was a crackhead and a puto." Uproarious laughter is the only good part about their constant bickering.
Wow, I'm glad he's out of the picture. Anyway, I have to get back to the real world. The rest of it later. Ciao!
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Lou Ryan makes a good Pinhead.
Crypticon Idol, a project my superhero boyfriend stars in, turned out to be funny stuff. For the sake of soup, WATCH IT!
Oh, and how to make a UFO... that'll be next post. I promise. Loves to all my unwilling subjects!
Oh, and how to make a UFO... that'll be next post. I promise. Loves to all my unwilling subjects!
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
WOOHOO! Everything from the end of last post until today!
My photos will have to wait until after the gym. But here's the text, from all the way back when!
Another clear day as I watch the traffic go by from the elliptical. And seagulls. Mike was pretty brilliant in his depiction of 'Cliff' (opposite me in The Woolgatherer). He almost upset the teacher, in fact, because he said he had to pee because trucking gives him a weak bladder. Even funnier, he was back in one second!
` I dragged someone from my Humanities class and some other people to Drama Club, saw Hot BiGuy from such a long time go, and on my way I ran into TallGuy, who I also dragged in, and he also participated. He shoved me into the incinerator with his martial arts skills!
` And then, after some amount of physical contact with someone else, I hung out with TallGuy and X-Dan in the library! It was awesome.
Blocking The Woolgatherer scene in Drama class. We have to have it down by Tuesday!
Window washers on side of office building! (Photo.)
Was going to type more journal entries into the computer because I have to stay current, but was told to do something else. I never have the feeling of making progress, you know?
The door was wide open today, and I had to go get Vada before I could take my shower. I suspected Johnny. And, speak of the devil, just as I was getting dressed, he came home, opened the bathroom door, turned off the light, turned it back on and came in.
` Then he saw me wrapped in a towel looking at him with crossed arms and shrank against Matty's door.
` "Now," I said, "When the door is shut, the light is on, and the fan is on, that means someone in here."
` "I'm sorry," he said, terrified out of his wits. "I guess I'm too stupid to remember that. Oh my God, That's the second time that's happened, just lock the door and it won't happen again."
` Who is stupider? Him, or me for not locking the door? Or Crazy Landlady for not letting us finish our bathrooms?
I just heaved a ton of books home, almost could not lift them all at once! They are:
` Asking the Right Questions; Logic and Contemporary Rhetoric; Foundations of Critical Thinking; Thinking For Yourself; Patterns For A Purpose; Writing Arguments; Making Sense; Thinking Critically; The Structure of Argument; Elements of Argument; Dialogues; Discovering Arguments; Convergences; Cultural Attractions/Cultural Distractions; Essays From Contemporary Culture; Many Voices; One World, Many Cultures; Acting Out Culture; The Everyday Writer; Evaluating Online Resources; Writing Analytically and; A Reader For Developing Writers.
` Expect my writing to improve!
In other news, I went to file taxes, finally! for the first time... but it turns out that, once again I have not made enough money to get a tax return this year. Perhaps next year's tax season will break my tax virginity.
Later in the evening: My feet were so black on the bottom I was called Nigger Toes!
` That's it!!
` Later, as B-Gangsta was messing around with a scratch card called Fabulous Fortune, which he found on the dining room table, he was saying; "Five dollars for a worthless piece of paper! You can pick your nose and flick it at your partner! You can pick up a basket! You can dunk it in some coffee!"
` I held my foot up and said, "You can scrape the Nigger off my foot!"
` Oh crap!!!!
You know how they do on MySpace?
Current Location: Elliptical, Gold's Gym.
Current Music: Don't Let Your Love Lie Down (wish I could change it!)
Current Mood: Triumph in Beating Elliptical, but kinda bummed because I left my water bottle on the table after filling it this morning.
Current Focus: The Old Guy With Crazy Gray Hair Who Always Works Out Wearing A Sweater and Jeans, on the treadmill just now.
On TV Closest To Me: Bull Riding.
Bodily Feeling: Refreshed, especially since I have had so much garlic that Lucas had to open the car windows, and for once in my life I don't have a ton of sticky snot that has to be blown out my nose every two minutes or else I'll get a sinus infection. These pipes are clean!
Had lunch at Cherry Blossom with Lou Ryan.
Just sitting down to finish an essay, which I have been sitting down to do for the past few days, when Matty came over and said "there's a special friend here to see you!"
` "My Handycam charger?"
` Nope. It was his tiny daughter. What is she? Two and a half? We played "Where's Jimi?" with a Jimi Hendrix songbook.
` I actually said; "Can you say Hendrix?"
` And she said; "Enrisss!"
That is so cute!
` Then, we looked at my bookshelf, as I said; "Hmmmmm" and rubbed my chin with one eyebrow raised. When I got distracted, she looked up at me and then looked back at the bookshelf, going, "Hmmmmm" as I had done, and then I was like; "Oh yeah! Hmmmmm...."
` We even drew on the White Board Of Doom, which was supposed to be on my wall by today.
` Okay, so she was cute and all, but I don't appreciate when people expect me to watch their kids just because I'm present in the house.
` After that, I practiced being Rose with Lou Ryan as Cliff, and finally, starting back to my assignment, it's 8:30 at night! How does this keep happening?
I didn't know I was supposed to go to Redmond for the commercial shoot, and thus would not have a chance to go to the gym, as the gym closes at 4 today. B Gangsta was pissed too because he didn't know either!
` I'm sorry, but I can't be standing around for 8 hours when I have a ton of homework to catch up on! Since the only thing I was supposed to do was take pictures during this entire time, I sent my camera along without me.
` Luckily, though I will have no camera hijinks - save for one sneak peek at the giant cat this morning - I am free to stay and do homework!
After sweeping the floor, retrieving Violet from the neighbor's yard, etc. I realized I was too hungry to do homework so got some peanut butter and toast - as there was no other food in the house because craft services all went with Lou Ryan, B Gangsta and Joe to Redmond.
` So, to quiet down the house, I turned the loud fish tank filter off for a bit, stopped the toilet from running, turned the microwave vent off and sat down to eat and read something that isn't too taxing on the mind. In the living room. Which I've never done before, with or without earplugs!
` No sooner did I sit down, a new noise started up; "Rrrrr rrr rr rrrrrrrrrrr...." It was a guy going around and around and around the neighbor's small backyard (to our left) on a minibike. I was surprised he didn't get dizzy.
` It's always something!
` After trying to cope with this using my earplugs for about twenty minutes, I gave up, turned the fishtank back on and went to my room.
An observation: I increasingly see the utility of window ledges, which we don't have: The cats jump into the windows, try to stand on them and fall off!
No school today!
Lou Ryan and I were at the Way That is Safe on the Way that is Broad, at the checkstand, when the woman ahead of us said of her change in the change-spewing machine; "Oh, don't put it in the donation box, just give it to him (Lou). I don't donate to anything unless it's for animals."
` "Yeah," I said, sarcastically, "screw the humans!"
` And would you know, she agreed!
Later, B-Gangsta was in our backseat, trying to get a hot chick's attention, and so was I from the front seat, but she was so absorbed in her cell phone conversation that she couldn't hear us.
` "That cannot be safe," he said. "What if the backseat was on fire?"
` Lou said, "Brad, you are not allowed to go out with such a dumbass."
Walking ten minutes from my car to Drama Class, my path converged with Hannah's and she asked, "Is that something in your hair?"
` I said, "Yes, that would be Smart Balance."
` It was then that I realized the magnitude of my Freak Status - and damn is it great!
Rose and Cliff went pretty good, by the way - it was the end of Act I, starting with "I have to be careful because of my hemophilia!" and we turned in our assignments as well.
` Then I had gym, came home, played with the cats, and then napped extensively with Vada: I actually fell asleep listening to Lou Ryan talking with whoever was home and woke up listening to them as if they'd never stopped talking. It was so weird.
Gangsta is getting some Apple Loops down, learning how to use Garage Band.
Also, Lou Ryan is suing Crazy Landlady. She keeps coming in unannounced, even without our knowledge, even at night when she might have her head blown off if one of us thought she was an intruder. (Assuming there's a gun somewhere.)
Lou Ryan just dialed Crazy Landlady's number, and the first thing he says is... "Hello, Su. No, you know that isn't true. I know that's not true because I talked to the man myself. It's okay, it's okay...."
` Now I'm at school, sitting around the table with the Cake Squad. Frank is Banana Bread Boy, Harlan is Creme Brulee, Nick is Key Lime Pie, Aries is Strawberry cake, etc.
` Later on, I got a chance to play with something that isn't abnormal. I'll just let you think about what that might be.
Lou Ryan videotaped the unfinished work around the house, went to the judge, got a restraining order for Crazy Landlady, who didn't show up in court, and she had just left home when Lou Ryan went to her house to give it to her; Johnny saw her leave on his way over here.
Today at school, I brought an apple, and was looking for a small knife to cut it (because my front teeth are too loose for apples at the moment), but Lou Ryan said, "What's wrong with this big knife?" I just left both in the car - it's not worth getting in trouble with security again for stupid stuff.
I spilled water in Harlan's car because of a faulty container. However, faultiness was not a major theme of the evening.
However, now that I'm at the gym I can say I was running towards the only working elliptical and someone else got on it! How often does that happen?
Later: I locked myself out of the house, for probably the third time ever (since the door's been fixed), and got back in the window. How does this happen? The sliding door has a tendency to lock behind oneself if you don't slide it shut slowly enough.
So, it's late at night and I was lying awake in bed, feeling the numbness start to 'peel off' my body, like the feeling I have been unable to sense for years was starting to uncurl. My lips and fingers, even, and my eyes felt like they were really there, not just disembodied windows in front of my face.
` I felt, physically, better than I had since... I don't know when!
And then, the asleep Lou Ryan slapped his hand across my face, scratching me in the eye!
"Owwww!" I yelled, waking him up. Then, just as I was starting to relax again, he rolled over on his side, putting both knees on one of my legs. I tried to scoot out from under him but almost fell off the bed, so I told him to move back.
` He did. I kept my eye open so that I would have less trouble feeling my eye better, trying to re-create how amazingly wonderful I had been feeling before. But then he kept asking me what was wrong. I said my eye hurt.
` A few minutes later, he asked why I was staring at the ceiling. I said I was holding my eye open because it hurt and I asked him why he was watching me instead of going back to sleep.
` He told me it was because me 'staring at the ceiling' was so creepy it was keeping him awake! Creepy?! My wonderful breakthrough, creepy?
` That was too much: The breakthrough reversed itself once more.
OMG! I'm in this playground right now and this 8 or 9 year old girl is on the phone with the cops because the other kids in the playground weren't playing what she wanted to play! The other kids were telling me how she broke things and, just a few minutes ago, threw a large rock at one kid's head.
` Apparently, the girl's mom is crazy. I feel pretty bad for her.
HOLY SHIT what a night! Just when I thought I'd be going to bed, though restless, Nymphomaniac called me, informing me of a party going on, so the guy, JustIn on the phone, who I'd said 'I love you' to because he sounded like such a hyper guy, persuaded me to go and so we went to Twisted where we were making up dances and all kinds of stuff.
` Poor JustIn's homophobic brother. I feel sorry for him.
(tons of pictures!)
Then we went to Rucker's pyramid and I found that JustIn has a little something not abnormal in itself, and then I wondered where Nympho and Jesus and JustIn's little brother had gone if they weren't nearby, and I reached in my pocket and my keys were gone!
(pictures of Rucker's tomb!)
Nympho had taken JustIn's homophobic brother home, and she had called while I was, er, busy, and she was wondering if my Jetta takes diesel (why does everyone ask or tell me that my Jetta takes diesel?) and then they bought food!
` Meanwhile JustIn and I were having one of those crazy, witty improvisational discussions like I had with Harlan before, which is odd, because he supposedly isn't a major improvist. I guess guys who are into me are easy to improv with.
` Anyway, we walked down Broadway towards being picked up by Nympho and Jesus, and just before this one picture, I was saying something like, "Naturally, that's because my dad is a psychotic, psychopathic, paranoid delusional, bipolar...."
` And JustIn was saying, "Stop describing... my father."
So we went to JustIn's apartment, hung out with Slagathor (the cat) and then after Nympho and Jesus left, he stole my pants and wouldn't give them back until I threatened to leave without them!
A disturbing thought - Justin is a lot like me and he looks like a cross between me and my brother! Weird!
The fish tank filter is finally dead. But the fish are alive and kicking, thank goodness! In fact, the Oscar cut Lou and Gangsta pretty bad as they chased him across the floor! Finally, they got the whole thing cleaned. Next time, they need to buy a net.
Poor Lou Ryan. Me and Gangsta have been pestering him for 15 minutes - I have crap to do and they need to go to the pet store. Oh, and Matty just called to see if Lou was around.
` At least Lou feels my frequent pain and pressure to get off the computer when I say, "Leave me alone so I can finish this and get off the computer!"
` I know this because he said; "I'm going to finish this whether anyone likes it or not!" and slammed the door.
Oh, and the neighbors across the street got burglarized. Apparently, no one lives there yet, and new appliances had just been installed. The burglars came by in a truck, parked in the garage, then used an electric saw to cut out the door between the garage and the house and stole all the appliances!
Also, I've officially gone insane because I can't seem to locate my own will when the house is polluted with beats all the time, yet Gangster won't use the headphones. Lou says that other people live in the house besides just me.
` Will my office continue to collect dust? Will I ever catch up on homework? I'm constantly toting it around the house because there's nowhere to go that's quiet enough that I can hear myself think - yes, WITH the earplugs! I wear them constantly around here!
After having a mental breakdown, we have a schedule going where I can do my homework and he won't be blasting music throughout the house. If I want to use my office, which I have all my stuff/computer in, for other things besides homework, I'll just have to wait until after bedtime.
Today I talked to the Harmonic Singing guy (Seattle Harmonic Voices) and he showed me how it's done. I missed the show because I had Humanities class - and I participated heavily in a presentation, but at least I caught him after the show and can now work on it myself.
What else?
Oh yeah... I was driving home from somewhere and was trying to turn left to get back onto Broadway but instead got on the ramp that loops around and goes to The Flats - the giant drawbridges to Marysville - where you can't stop. Just then, my tire blew out, my car veered to one side, it was raining, and I was stuck on the damn bridge!
` It was cold and dark and soaking wet where I found a place to pull over, and I couldn't figure out how to get the hubcap off.
` Well, Lou Ryan, being the superhero that he is, came down straight away, got the cover off the bolts, then discovered that one of them was a freak star-shaped bolt that no tool he had ever seen could take off.
` So, after such floundering around in the cold rain with a flashlight, he drove me back home where I had found that Johnny had bought me a salmon steak and I ate it! Johnny also said that the alien star bolt was actually a security bolt and there's a tool hidden under the floormat for getting it off.
We never would have guessed.
It snowed! Except out between the drawbridges where my car was at. (Score!) We discovered that my spare tire is a regular tire, so now I went from having a crappy, leaky tire that needs to be filled every day to a Brand New Tire! For free!
But what if another tire goes flat?
Had to speak gibberish in Drama class, using a stool for a barrel for Niagra Falls jumping. Beth, of course, laughed hysterically. I wonder why she does that?
` Other scenes involved tying people up, guns, and wacky gestures all in combination with gibberish. The Halloween Killer's publicist, when he encourages him to practice saying "Trick or treat!" before blowing someone away was translated as "Derka derka, Mohammed jihad!"
After school I was using the last of my Handycam battery to videotape Lou Ryan mailing a check to Su via Priority Mail at the post office. As we were exiting the post office, we saw her park behind my car on the street and hurry, in a panic, to her lawyer's office.
` By the time I was sure she hadn't noticed us and raised the camera to my eye, she had already disappeared up the steps.
` She had been carrying a large envelope - probably the demand she'd received from Lou Ryan today in the mail.
Very busy day. Violet chased the neighbor's Pomeranian. (photos)
Serious Weekend!
Lou Ryan had to prevent some wackos in need of Ritallin from smashing the back of my car at a red light by pulling into the intersection!
Also, JustIn just got his tongue pierced and has mysterious white stuff he thought was gingivitis. He had just got tired of waiting at the ER and then called me, intending to go back later.
` I told him it was probably thrush, because it just so happens that Lou Ryan was telling me about it recently.
Another sunny day! I just got home. I have a test tomorrow.
After dinner, Johnny and Matty scoffed at the invention of anti-aircraft lasers. Matty, who works for Boeing, said, "Oh, that's right, I forgot we made those!"
` But Johnny still said, "No, there is no such thing" and wouldn't at first read one of many articles about the military having developed a working prototype. Apparently he stopped at the words, 'targeting sights' at the top of a paragraph and said, "Okay, like I said, it's a giant targeting sight."
` I said, "Look at the bottom of the paragraph! What do you think 'high energy laser' means?"
` He said "Great, like I said, it's a giant pair of targeting sights, that's all it is," and left the room.
He eventually recanted, however.
Whoops. I didn't file down enough the part of my new retainer that goes around the gumline. It pushed my gums back from my teeth.
At least it's a nice day.
Cleared off the rest of the living room bookshelf, and Lou Ryan was able to put his things on it instead so the dining room table is not covered with all his stuff.
Sun streams outside, but not in the gym where I'm on the elliptical. Lou just walked in to say that our dear old Crazy Landlady broke the restraining order, so he called the police! That woman....
Late at night, as we were going to bed, Johnny and Matty were in the dining room and Matty was playing with Lou's tape recorder, which has the C.L. saying something incriminating on it. Understandably Lou freaked out.
LOLOL! In court this morning, Crazy Landlady and her new lawyer were most pathetic. He took like an hour to make photocopies of everything, and there was a long period of time where everyone in the room was sitting with nothing going on, even after other people had gone ahead of us.
` I actually said to a guy who was with C.L. - who also thinks she is crazy - "I wonder if the lawyer just ran off?"
` Finally, when the trial was underway, one of the things he'd copied and showed to the judge was C.L.'s demand letter to Lou Ryan, which starts off describing an incident she made up where Lou was threatening her with karate and punched a hole in the wall.
` I almost peed my pants laughing.
` Her new lawyer didn't know what to make of this, other than perhaps the reasons why the other lawyer wouldn't take her case.
Also, armed with his briefcase, Lou was so full of evidence - photos, the tape recording from over the phone, insane documents from her, etc. - that he did something that Johnny later called The Lucas Jig. Very early on, in fact, the judge said, "Please don't interrupt me, sir, I get enough of that from my wife."
` However, he didn't even need the evidence because this trial was not about the state of our house but rather her intrusion.
` The judge told her, "Leave them alone," she said, "Thank you, sir!" and that was the end.
Nice sunrise photo! Here's another photo of me between my listening to World War II Japanese internment camp presentation and practicing lines with Patience.
` Argh. Children in the house!
When Gold's John got home today from working on the new gym building, he grabbed something from our front door - a 10-day notice to comply. In legal terms, it is retaliation for our protecting our rights. It just goes to show how Crazy that Crazy Landlady is.
The snowstorms have cleared from the sky via wind. I meant to do some homework yesterday but was too exhausted. So, when I finally sat down to do some homework, the cats both came in my office, stepped on the improperly-mounted shelf that Lou Ryan said was fine... and all the books on it came tumbling down on my head!
After some oatmeal and pancakes, I'm back at it.
Also, I called JustIn to make sure he wasn't dead. Apparently, his mom had some thrush medication and it worked! No Emergency Room bill! Yay!
The hearing with Crazy Landlady went well, though I didn't go. Once more, C.L. got thrown out of court. Also, there was a surprise snowstorm, which was picking up on my way out to school.
` By the time my Jetta had made it to the top of the hill, there was so much snow that I couldn't go any farther - being that there were no tracks on the road yet since the snow had started falling.
` Luckily, Lou Ryan, who was watching my progress from the house, hopped in his truck and rescued me. He even parked my car by the side of the road.
` At this moment, I'm in his truck - he's driving me to school. I hope the cats aren't freezing right now - I'd let them out earlier and they went straight under the porch.
We're just coming up Broadway and passed a mailbox-no-more next to a minivan-no-more!
Now we're in downtown - it's a total grey-out! It's so weird I wish I had my camera! Barely anything past the next traffic light can be seen.
Just got into the north end of town, towards the college... there's no snow in the air, but there is a tiny bit on the grass.
Wow, Drama class was so fun! We were singing with the voice instructor's piano accompaniments, but not songs. Instead one would hear "Smurf!" "Zucchini!" "Noodle!" "Knives!" Since my word was "Tomato" I made sure I got up there to oppose the girl whose word was "Potato." But we didn't call the whole thing off.
I had/got to walk from 10th St to the gym on 29th St, after Lou Ryan called to say his truck had gotten stuck in the snow on the way back home!
` There was a little bit of snow on the ground at first, but as I made my way into town, there was more and more snow on the sidewalks and a guy almost got hit at a school crosswalk and pretty soon I was marching quickly through deep snow with my tote bag slung over my back! (Marching was the only way I could run.)
` John hadn't even made it to the gym until after I got there, as his truck had gotten mired in the snow as well! He showed me a picture he took on his cell phone of the ruler on the porch railing sticking out of the snow. It eventually got to 6 inches deep!
` I took the bus to Albertson's on Madison (about the equivalent of 68th St.) and then, as the snow was continuing to quickly melt, Lou Ryan was able to extract his truck and Johnny was there too and drove us home after shopping there.
Violet had 'lost' the collar I'd just bought her (because she'd just 'lost' the one she'd had before), and Vada had been nowhere to be seen all day. It was getting colder and darker, and was probably below freezing when I finally I went out there with a flashlight and climbed over the fence.
` Immediately I heard the bell ringing on Violet's new collar! So I'd found that, hanging on a bramble. Vada was right there as well, crying at me, apparently too cold to come back across the snow. The pussy. Cat.
` So, I picked up the collar, tossed the flashlight into the middle of the yard, made note of where it landed (in plain sight) grabbed Vada and then went over to get the flashlight, but I couldn't see it anywhere! (It should have stood out in the snow, you know?)
` But hey, I scored a cat and a missing collar. That's better than what I'd hoped for.
Our front door had been hanging wide open all night. We suspect Matty, who had come by sometime late. It was amazing the cats didn't go out - but perhaps they found it too cold.
In drama class we got a sneak peek of Sketch Night... "It's Morphin' Time!" "Joint Ranger!" "Cell Phone Ranger!" "Key Ranger!"
My front teeth are disturbingly short today. Is my homemade retainer damaging my enamel that much?
Had an awesome conversation with Bev Farb about my screenplay today. She seemed rather enthusiastic.
` However, I missed Sketch Night. Damn.
Violet confronted the orange cat outside. B Gangsta got a really close look.... (photos)
Awake at 4:30 in the morning because of my teeth - but I discovered that they were just 'short' because they were being pushed up into my skull.
` Then I watched the sun rise. It was cool. I didn't get any pictures of it, but I did get a couple of Violet in the neighbor's yard staring at the birds (but not knowing what to do).
It's been rough today, and I don't want to talk about it. But there has been good news:
With a seafood sandwich from Subway in my hand, I returned home after getting my Jetta an oil change - only 30 bucks because it was customer appreciation day, so I could save my coupon! - and Lou and Brad were hanging out also eating Subway. But Lou was covered in fake blood stains! (photos!)
` They were telling me and Johnny how, in filming more of Liberation with Nils Osmar, that Gangster got to shoot at someone with not just one but two guns before being shot in the neck, which exploded. Then, with his face disguised via a gas mask, he drowned poor Lou Ryan in a sink of icewater in an unheated room, where he had to pretend to be dead on a freezing cold concrete floor!
` I know he's resistant to that stuff - Former-Director Nate got some good footage of him doing Sanchin barefoot in a blizzard, also completely bald and shirtless. Even so, Lou had to huddle around a stage light in order to maintain his composure.
Also, they got a veggie sandwich for me. I got to eat half of it later.
Snowed for a while. I spent a while honing my pep talk skills. Does anyone recall that a long time ago, I was with this Phil guy (who I never had a physical relationship with), and I started my Mad Scientist blog when I was in the process of moving the hell away from him?
` I no longer feel guilty for doing that. Who cares if he got me a ring before I could tell him I needed out? Best of all, I feel even more relived for never having had sex with him.
` Turns out that he's been rather controlling and cold towards his mom, who has many problems, among them being overworked both at school and work. Also, the property's gone to hell and she has no way of fixing anything because of really disabling arthritis, not to mention a severely ingrown toenail that grows back, which she tears out every month herself with a pair of pliers!
` This year she was also not able to remove the snow from a greenhouse during one blizzard and it caved in!
` Worst of all, a faithful worker over the past few years refused to help with this, saying it's "women's work", and the only person who ever made her laugh has gone off to Europe and hasn't answered his phone and got irritated at her because he interpreted something she said as kind of weird because she didn't say it right because she was on pain meds for her arthritis.
Yes, for the past few years, Phil has been disrespectful to his own mother, who shielded him from his abusive, maniacal, gun-slinging psychotic father, often taking the blame for things he did. And yet, Phil doesn't seem to quite believe this, and when he goes back home for a visit he spends most of his time at his dad's!
` When he got married, he even invited his mom's worst enemies - the even crazier parents of his dad who used to try to kill Phil when he was a baby - to the wedding even though they proposed to make a scene to embarrass Phil's mom!
` Wow, I'm gladder than ever that I got out of there. He gets some of that stuff from EdgeWalker, who's a smart guy, but is sometimes overbearing, and has apparently turned the both of them into intellectual snobs.
Also, I practiced the scene with Patience in the studio room in Ranier building. We even did it backwards once, and were fairly successful! Also struck up a conversation. She was also abused as a kid, but apparently it's less funny, and so bad that her dad got caught and she was adopted. She also lives near us.
It's late, I'm at the gym. Violet ran out the door after dark, so I hope she comes back before we go to bed. Me and Brad got $120 worth of groceries at Grocery Outlet for $60! (Wow, everything really is more or less half off!)
I got a hundred percent on my poster project. Other presentations included Irish Dance (NOT Riverdance!) and Philippine Tinikling Dance, which involves jumping in between pieces of bamboo that are being clapped together really loudly.
` Right now I'm watching some people push a car down the street near the gym. The crane is also up really high today!
The performance went well. It's Scene 2 from Wonder of the World. Bev laughed all crazy like usual - other people laughed too - when I pulled the blanket off the 'barrel' in my lap to reveal a milk crate with a large drawing of a barrel on it!
Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. Bastard warranty won't cover the repairs for my Jetta, which have been needed since I first got the car from the Chevy dealership. I knew those bastards would get me somehow. Worst part is, I need $234 just to get my car back from the Volkswagen folks, instead of the expected $100.
` Zzzzzzz. I've been sick, but at least it's not a sinus infection this time.
Also, on Monday, I called Phil's mom, who said that Phil actually appreciated the confrontation and did more work for her that week than he had in the past five years. Wow!
I went off to the gym in Lou Ryan's truck, not having my car back yet, with the intention of working out and then driving John home, as he doesn't have a car right now. Except... I couldn't figure out how to unstick the clutch when coming up the hill!
` Lou Ryan wasn't answering his phone, but luckily a cop happened by so I flagged him down and he pushed me into the turnout with his bumper bar thingy. Best thing was, Lou Ryan and B Gangsta could see the whole thing happen!
` Only then did Lou tell me about the trick to keeping the transmission from getting stuck.
Beautiful sunny day, of which I spent 4 hours getting disability tested. Disturbing amounts of Jones Pure Cane Cola in the house. Lots of cheap/free food for us. Hooray!
` Finally got my car back. There was a note on the door from Crazy Landlady. Apparently she's going to let us resume work on the house in two days. Quick! Everyone take pictures of the wiring before she has a chance to cover it up!
` God! I was asleep the entire time they were gone, now they're back and bugging me while I'm on the computer. But at least I got this done! Onto the gym! And then I'll drive John home, as he doesn't have a car - but I do because we got my car back from getting it looked at and the warranty not covering anything.
` At least I got my car back, and I know what's wrong with it!
February 11, 2009 - Wednesday
Another clear day as I watch the traffic go by from the elliptical. And seagulls. Mike was pretty brilliant in his depiction of 'Cliff' (opposite me in The Woolgatherer). He almost upset the teacher, in fact, because he said he had to pee because trucking gives him a weak bladder. Even funnier, he was back in one second!
` I dragged someone from my Humanities class and some other people to Drama Club, saw Hot BiGuy from such a long time go, and on my way I ran into TallGuy, who I also dragged in, and he also participated. He shoved me into the incinerator with his martial arts skills!
` And then, after some amount of physical contact with someone else, I hung out with TallGuy and X-Dan in the library! It was awesome.
February 12 - Thursday
Blocking The Woolgatherer scene in Drama class. We have to have it down by Tuesday!
Window washers on side of office building! (Photo.)
Was going to type more journal entries into the computer because I have to stay current, but was told to do something else. I never have the feeling of making progress, you know?
The door was wide open today, and I had to go get Vada before I could take my shower. I suspected Johnny. And, speak of the devil, just as I was getting dressed, he came home, opened the bathroom door, turned off the light, turned it back on and came in.
` Then he saw me wrapped in a towel looking at him with crossed arms and shrank against Matty's door.
` "Now," I said, "When the door is shut, the light is on, and the fan is on, that means someone in here."
` "I'm sorry," he said, terrified out of his wits. "I guess I'm too stupid to remember that. Oh my God, That's the second time that's happened, just lock the door and it won't happen again."
` Who is stupider? Him, or me for not locking the door? Or Crazy Landlady for not letting us finish our bathrooms?
February 13 - Friday
I just heaved a ton of books home, almost could not lift them all at once! They are:
` Asking the Right Questions; Logic and Contemporary Rhetoric; Foundations of Critical Thinking; Thinking For Yourself; Patterns For A Purpose; Writing Arguments; Making Sense; Thinking Critically; The Structure of Argument; Elements of Argument; Dialogues; Discovering Arguments; Convergences; Cultural Attractions/Cultural Distractions; Essays From Contemporary Culture; Many Voices; One World, Many Cultures; Acting Out Culture; The Everyday Writer; Evaluating Online Resources; Writing Analytically and; A Reader For Developing Writers.
` Expect my writing to improve!
In other news, I went to file taxes, finally! for the first time... but it turns out that, once again I have not made enough money to get a tax return this year. Perhaps next year's tax season will break my tax virginity.
Later in the evening: My feet were so black on the bottom I was called Nigger Toes!
` That's it!!
` Later, as B-Gangsta was messing around with a scratch card called Fabulous Fortune, which he found on the dining room table, he was saying; "Five dollars for a worthless piece of paper! You can pick your nose and flick it at your partner! You can pick up a basket! You can dunk it in some coffee!"
` I held my foot up and said, "You can scrape the Nigger off my foot!"
` Oh crap!!!!
February 14 - Saturday (Valentine's Day)
You know how they do on MySpace?
Current Location: Elliptical, Gold's Gym.
Current Music: Don't Let Your Love Lie Down (wish I could change it!)
Current Mood: Triumph in Beating Elliptical, but kinda bummed because I left my water bottle on the table after filling it this morning.
Current Focus: The Old Guy With Crazy Gray Hair Who Always Works Out Wearing A Sweater and Jeans, on the treadmill just now.
On TV Closest To Me: Bull Riding.
Bodily Feeling: Refreshed, especially since I have had so much garlic that Lucas had to open the car windows, and for once in my life I don't have a ton of sticky snot that has to be blown out my nose every two minutes or else I'll get a sinus infection. These pipes are clean!
Had lunch at Cherry Blossom with Lou Ryan.
Just sitting down to finish an essay, which I have been sitting down to do for the past few days, when Matty came over and said "there's a special friend here to see you!"
` "My Handycam charger?"
` Nope. It was his tiny daughter. What is she? Two and a half? We played "Where's Jimi?" with a Jimi Hendrix songbook.
` I actually said; "Can you say Hendrix?"
` And she said; "Enrisss!"
That is so cute!
` Then, we looked at my bookshelf, as I said; "Hmmmmm" and rubbed my chin with one eyebrow raised. When I got distracted, she looked up at me and then looked back at the bookshelf, going, "Hmmmmm" as I had done, and then I was like; "Oh yeah! Hmmmmm...."
` We even drew on the White Board Of Doom, which was supposed to be on my wall by today.
` Okay, so she was cute and all, but I don't appreciate when people expect me to watch their kids just because I'm present in the house.
` After that, I practiced being Rose with Lou Ryan as Cliff, and finally, starting back to my assignment, it's 8:30 at night! How does this keep happening?
February 15 - Sunday
I didn't know I was supposed to go to Redmond for the commercial shoot, and thus would not have a chance to go to the gym, as the gym closes at 4 today. B Gangsta was pissed too because he didn't know either!
` I'm sorry, but I can't be standing around for 8 hours when I have a ton of homework to catch up on! Since the only thing I was supposed to do was take pictures during this entire time, I sent my camera along without me.
` Luckily, though I will have no camera hijinks - save for one sneak peek at the giant cat this morning - I am free to stay and do homework!
After sweeping the floor, retrieving Violet from the neighbor's yard, etc. I realized I was too hungry to do homework so got some peanut butter and toast - as there was no other food in the house because craft services all went with Lou Ryan, B Gangsta and Joe to Redmond.
` So, to quiet down the house, I turned the loud fish tank filter off for a bit, stopped the toilet from running, turned the microwave vent off and sat down to eat and read something that isn't too taxing on the mind. In the living room. Which I've never done before, with or without earplugs!
` No sooner did I sit down, a new noise started up; "Rrrrr rrr rr rrrrrrrrrrr...." It was a guy going around and around and around the neighbor's small backyard (to our left) on a minibike. I was surprised he didn't get dizzy.
` It's always something!
` After trying to cope with this using my earplugs for about twenty minutes, I gave up, turned the fishtank back on and went to my room.
An observation: I increasingly see the utility of window ledges, which we don't have: The cats jump into the windows, try to stand on them and fall off!
February 16 - Monday
No school today!
Lou Ryan and I were at the Way That is Safe on the Way that is Broad, at the checkstand, when the woman ahead of us said of her change in the change-spewing machine; "Oh, don't put it in the donation box, just give it to him (Lou). I don't donate to anything unless it's for animals."
` "Yeah," I said, sarcastically, "screw the humans!"
` And would you know, she agreed!
Later, B-Gangsta was in our backseat, trying to get a hot chick's attention, and so was I from the front seat, but she was so absorbed in her cell phone conversation that she couldn't hear us.
` "That cannot be safe," he said. "What if the backseat was on fire?"
` Lou said, "Brad, you are not allowed to go out with such a dumbass."
February 17 - Tuesday
Walking ten minutes from my car to Drama Class, my path converged with Hannah's and she asked, "Is that something in your hair?"
` I said, "Yes, that would be Smart Balance."
` It was then that I realized the magnitude of my Freak Status - and damn is it great!
Rose and Cliff went pretty good, by the way - it was the end of Act I, starting with "I have to be careful because of my hemophilia!" and we turned in our assignments as well.
` Then I had gym, came home, played with the cats, and then napped extensively with Vada: I actually fell asleep listening to Lou Ryan talking with whoever was home and woke up listening to them as if they'd never stopped talking. It was so weird.
Gangsta is getting some Apple Loops down, learning how to use Garage Band.
Also, Lou Ryan is suing Crazy Landlady. She keeps coming in unannounced, even without our knowledge, even at night when she might have her head blown off if one of us thought she was an intruder. (Assuming there's a gun somewhere.)
February 18 - Wednesday
Lou Ryan just dialed Crazy Landlady's number, and the first thing he says is... "Hello, Su. No, you know that isn't true. I know that's not true because I talked to the man myself. It's okay, it's okay...."
` Now I'm at school, sitting around the table with the Cake Squad. Frank is Banana Bread Boy, Harlan is Creme Brulee, Nick is Key Lime Pie, Aries is Strawberry cake, etc.
` Later on, I got a chance to play with something that isn't abnormal. I'll just let you think about what that might be.
February 19 - Thursday
Lou Ryan videotaped the unfinished work around the house, went to the judge, got a restraining order for Crazy Landlady, who didn't show up in court, and she had just left home when Lou Ryan went to her house to give it to her; Johnny saw her leave on his way over here.
Today at school, I brought an apple, and was looking for a small knife to cut it (because my front teeth are too loose for apples at the moment), but Lou Ryan said, "What's wrong with this big knife?" I just left both in the car - it's not worth getting in trouble with security again for stupid stuff.
I spilled water in Harlan's car because of a faulty container. However, faultiness was not a major theme of the evening.
However, now that I'm at the gym I can say I was running towards the only working elliptical and someone else got on it! How often does that happen?
Later: I locked myself out of the house, for probably the third time ever (since the door's been fixed), and got back in the window. How does this happen? The sliding door has a tendency to lock behind oneself if you don't slide it shut slowly enough.
So, it's late at night and I was lying awake in bed, feeling the numbness start to 'peel off' my body, like the feeling I have been unable to sense for years was starting to uncurl. My lips and fingers, even, and my eyes felt like they were really there, not just disembodied windows in front of my face.
` I felt, physically, better than I had since... I don't know when!
And then, the asleep Lou Ryan slapped his hand across my face, scratching me in the eye!
"Owwww!" I yelled, waking him up. Then, just as I was starting to relax again, he rolled over on his side, putting both knees on one of my legs. I tried to scoot out from under him but almost fell off the bed, so I told him to move back.
` He did. I kept my eye open so that I would have less trouble feeling my eye better, trying to re-create how amazingly wonderful I had been feeling before. But then he kept asking me what was wrong. I said my eye hurt.
` A few minutes later, he asked why I was staring at the ceiling. I said I was holding my eye open because it hurt and I asked him why he was watching me instead of going back to sleep.
` He told me it was because me 'staring at the ceiling' was so creepy it was keeping him awake! Creepy?! My wonderful breakthrough, creepy?
` That was too much: The breakthrough reversed itself once more.
February 21 - Saturday
OMG! I'm in this playground right now and this 8 or 9 year old girl is on the phone with the cops because the other kids in the playground weren't playing what she wanted to play! The other kids were telling me how she broke things and, just a few minutes ago, threw a large rock at one kid's head.
` Apparently, the girl's mom is crazy. I feel pretty bad for her.
HOLY SHIT what a night! Just when I thought I'd be going to bed, though restless, Nymphomaniac called me, informing me of a party going on, so the guy, JustIn on the phone, who I'd said 'I love you' to because he sounded like such a hyper guy, persuaded me to go and so we went to Twisted where we were making up dances and all kinds of stuff.
` Poor JustIn's homophobic brother. I feel sorry for him.
(tons of pictures!)
Then we went to Rucker's pyramid and I found that JustIn has a little something not abnormal in itself, and then I wondered where Nympho and Jesus and JustIn's little brother had gone if they weren't nearby, and I reached in my pocket and my keys were gone!
(pictures of Rucker's tomb!)
Nympho had taken JustIn's homophobic brother home, and she had called while I was, er, busy, and she was wondering if my Jetta takes diesel (why does everyone ask or tell me that my Jetta takes diesel?) and then they bought food!
` Meanwhile JustIn and I were having one of those crazy, witty improvisational discussions like I had with Harlan before, which is odd, because he supposedly isn't a major improvist. I guess guys who are into me are easy to improv with.
` Anyway, we walked down Broadway towards being picked up by Nympho and Jesus, and just before this one picture, I was saying something like, "Naturally, that's because my dad is a psychotic, psychopathic, paranoid delusional, bipolar...."
` And JustIn was saying, "Stop describing... my father."
So we went to JustIn's apartment, hung out with Slagathor (the cat) and then after Nympho and Jesus left, he stole my pants and wouldn't give them back until I threatened to leave without them!
A disturbing thought - Justin is a lot like me and he looks like a cross between me and my brother! Weird!
February 22 - Sunday
The fish tank filter is finally dead. But the fish are alive and kicking, thank goodness! In fact, the Oscar cut Lou and Gangsta pretty bad as they chased him across the floor! Finally, they got the whole thing cleaned. Next time, they need to buy a net.
Poor Lou Ryan. Me and Gangsta have been pestering him for 15 minutes - I have crap to do and they need to go to the pet store. Oh, and Matty just called to see if Lou was around.
` At least Lou feels my frequent pain and pressure to get off the computer when I say, "Leave me alone so I can finish this and get off the computer!"
` I know this because he said; "I'm going to finish this whether anyone likes it or not!" and slammed the door.
Oh, and the neighbors across the street got burglarized. Apparently, no one lives there yet, and new appliances had just been installed. The burglars came by in a truck, parked in the garage, then used an electric saw to cut out the door between the garage and the house and stole all the appliances!
Also, I've officially gone insane because I can't seem to locate my own will when the house is polluted with beats all the time, yet Gangster won't use the headphones. Lou says that other people live in the house besides just me.
` Will my office continue to collect dust? Will I ever catch up on homework? I'm constantly toting it around the house because there's nowhere to go that's quiet enough that I can hear myself think - yes, WITH the earplugs! I wear them constantly around here!
February 25 - Wednesday
After having a mental breakdown, we have a schedule going where I can do my homework and he won't be blasting music throughout the house. If I want to use my office, which I have all my stuff/computer in, for other things besides homework, I'll just have to wait until after bedtime.
Today I talked to the Harmonic Singing guy (Seattle Harmonic Voices) and he showed me how it's done. I missed the show because I had Humanities class - and I participated heavily in a presentation, but at least I caught him after the show and can now work on it myself.
What else?
Oh yeah... I was driving home from somewhere and was trying to turn left to get back onto Broadway but instead got on the ramp that loops around and goes to The Flats - the giant drawbridges to Marysville - where you can't stop. Just then, my tire blew out, my car veered to one side, it was raining, and I was stuck on the damn bridge!
` It was cold and dark and soaking wet where I found a place to pull over, and I couldn't figure out how to get the hubcap off.
` Well, Lou Ryan, being the superhero that he is, came down straight away, got the cover off the bolts, then discovered that one of them was a freak star-shaped bolt that no tool he had ever seen could take off.
` So, after such floundering around in the cold rain with a flashlight, he drove me back home where I had found that Johnny had bought me a salmon steak and I ate it! Johnny also said that the alien star bolt was actually a security bolt and there's a tool hidden under the floormat for getting it off.
We never would have guessed.
February 26 - Thursday
It snowed! Except out between the drawbridges where my car was at. (Score!) We discovered that my spare tire is a regular tire, so now I went from having a crappy, leaky tire that needs to be filled every day to a Brand New Tire! For free!
But what if another tire goes flat?
Had to speak gibberish in Drama class, using a stool for a barrel for Niagra Falls jumping. Beth, of course, laughed hysterically. I wonder why she does that?
` Other scenes involved tying people up, guns, and wacky gestures all in combination with gibberish. The Halloween Killer's publicist, when he encourages him to practice saying "Trick or treat!" before blowing someone away was translated as "Derka derka, Mohammed jihad!"
After school I was using the last of my Handycam battery to videotape Lou Ryan mailing a check to Su via Priority Mail at the post office. As we were exiting the post office, we saw her park behind my car on the street and hurry, in a panic, to her lawyer's office.
` By the time I was sure she hadn't noticed us and raised the camera to my eye, she had already disappeared up the steps.
` She had been carrying a large envelope - probably the demand she'd received from Lou Ryan today in the mail.
February 27 - Friday
Very busy day. Violet chased the neighbor's Pomeranian. (photos)
Serious Weekend!
Lou Ryan had to prevent some wackos in need of Ritallin from smashing the back of my car at a red light by pulling into the intersection!
Also, JustIn just got his tongue pierced and has mysterious white stuff he thought was gingivitis. He had just got tired of waiting at the ER and then called me, intending to go back later.
` I told him it was probably thrush, because it just so happens that Lou Ryan was telling me about it recently.
March 2, 2009 - Monday
Another sunny day! I just got home. I have a test tomorrow.
After dinner, Johnny and Matty scoffed at the invention of anti-aircraft lasers. Matty, who works for Boeing, said, "Oh, that's right, I forgot we made those!"
` But Johnny still said, "No, there is no such thing" and wouldn't at first read one of many articles about the military having developed a working prototype. Apparently he stopped at the words, 'targeting sights' at the top of a paragraph and said, "Okay, like I said, it's a giant targeting sight."
` I said, "Look at the bottom of the paragraph! What do you think 'high energy laser' means?"
` He said "Great, like I said, it's a giant pair of targeting sights, that's all it is," and left the room.
He eventually recanted, however.
March 3 - Tuesday
Whoops. I didn't file down enough the part of my new retainer that goes around the gumline. It pushed my gums back from my teeth.
At least it's a nice day.
Cleared off the rest of the living room bookshelf, and Lou Ryan was able to put his things on it instead so the dining room table is not covered with all his stuff.
March 4 - Wednesday
Sun streams outside, but not in the gym where I'm on the elliptical. Lou just walked in to say that our dear old Crazy Landlady broke the restraining order, so he called the police! That woman....
Late at night, as we were going to bed, Johnny and Matty were in the dining room and Matty was playing with Lou's tape recorder, which has the C.L. saying something incriminating on it. Understandably Lou freaked out.
March 5 - Thursday
LOLOL! In court this morning, Crazy Landlady and her new lawyer were most pathetic. He took like an hour to make photocopies of everything, and there was a long period of time where everyone in the room was sitting with nothing going on, even after other people had gone ahead of us.
` I actually said to a guy who was with C.L. - who also thinks she is crazy - "I wonder if the lawyer just ran off?"
` Finally, when the trial was underway, one of the things he'd copied and showed to the judge was C.L.'s demand letter to Lou Ryan, which starts off describing an incident she made up where Lou was threatening her with karate and punched a hole in the wall.
` I almost peed my pants laughing.
` Her new lawyer didn't know what to make of this, other than perhaps the reasons why the other lawyer wouldn't take her case.
Also, armed with his briefcase, Lou was so full of evidence - photos, the tape recording from over the phone, insane documents from her, etc. - that he did something that Johnny later called The Lucas Jig. Very early on, in fact, the judge said, "Please don't interrupt me, sir, I get enough of that from my wife."
` However, he didn't even need the evidence because this trial was not about the state of our house but rather her intrusion.
` The judge told her, "Leave them alone," she said, "Thank you, sir!" and that was the end.
March 6 - Friday
Nice sunrise photo! Here's another photo of me between my listening to World War II Japanese internment camp presentation and practicing lines with Patience.
` Argh. Children in the house!
When Gold's John got home today from working on the new gym building, he grabbed something from our front door - a 10-day notice to comply. In legal terms, it is retaliation for our protecting our rights. It just goes to show how Crazy that Crazy Landlady is.
March 7 - Saturday
The snowstorms have cleared from the sky via wind. I meant to do some homework yesterday but was too exhausted. So, when I finally sat down to do some homework, the cats both came in my office, stepped on the improperly-mounted shelf that Lou Ryan said was fine... and all the books on it came tumbling down on my head!
After some oatmeal and pancakes, I'm back at it.
Also, I called JustIn to make sure he wasn't dead. Apparently, his mom had some thrush medication and it worked! No Emergency Room bill! Yay!
March 9 - Monday
The hearing with Crazy Landlady went well, though I didn't go. Once more, C.L. got thrown out of court. Also, there was a surprise snowstorm, which was picking up on my way out to school.
` By the time my Jetta had made it to the top of the hill, there was so much snow that I couldn't go any farther - being that there were no tracks on the road yet since the snow had started falling.
` Luckily, Lou Ryan, who was watching my progress from the house, hopped in his truck and rescued me. He even parked my car by the side of the road.
` At this moment, I'm in his truck - he's driving me to school. I hope the cats aren't freezing right now - I'd let them out earlier and they went straight under the porch.
We're just coming up Broadway and passed a mailbox-no-more next to a minivan-no-more!
Now we're in downtown - it's a total grey-out! It's so weird I wish I had my camera! Barely anything past the next traffic light can be seen.
Just got into the north end of town, towards the college... there's no snow in the air, but there is a tiny bit on the grass.
Wow, Drama class was so fun! We were singing with the voice instructor's piano accompaniments, but not songs. Instead one would hear "Smurf!" "Zucchini!" "Noodle!" "Knives!" Since my word was "Tomato" I made sure I got up there to oppose the girl whose word was "Potato." But we didn't call the whole thing off.
I had/got to walk from 10th St to the gym on 29th St, after Lou Ryan called to say his truck had gotten stuck in the snow on the way back home!
` There was a little bit of snow on the ground at first, but as I made my way into town, there was more and more snow on the sidewalks and a guy almost got hit at a school crosswalk and pretty soon I was marching quickly through deep snow with my tote bag slung over my back! (Marching was the only way I could run.)
` John hadn't even made it to the gym until after I got there, as his truck had gotten mired in the snow as well! He showed me a picture he took on his cell phone of the ruler on the porch railing sticking out of the snow. It eventually got to 6 inches deep!
` I took the bus to Albertson's on Madison (about the equivalent of 68th St.) and then, as the snow was continuing to quickly melt, Lou Ryan was able to extract his truck and Johnny was there too and drove us home after shopping there.
Violet had 'lost' the collar I'd just bought her (because she'd just 'lost' the one she'd had before), and Vada had been nowhere to be seen all day. It was getting colder and darker, and was probably below freezing when I finally I went out there with a flashlight and climbed over the fence.
` Immediately I heard the bell ringing on Violet's new collar! So I'd found that, hanging on a bramble. Vada was right there as well, crying at me, apparently too cold to come back across the snow. The pussy. Cat.
` So, I picked up the collar, tossed the flashlight into the middle of the yard, made note of where it landed (in plain sight) grabbed Vada and then went over to get the flashlight, but I couldn't see it anywhere! (It should have stood out in the snow, you know?)
` But hey, I scored a cat and a missing collar. That's better than what I'd hoped for.
March 11 Wednesday
Our front door had been hanging wide open all night. We suspect Matty, who had come by sometime late. It was amazing the cats didn't go out - but perhaps they found it too cold.
In drama class we got a sneak peek of Sketch Night... "It's Morphin' Time!" "Joint Ranger!" "Cell Phone Ranger!" "Key Ranger!"
My front teeth are disturbingly short today. Is my homemade retainer damaging my enamel that much?
Had an awesome conversation with Bev Farb about my screenplay today. She seemed rather enthusiastic.
` However, I missed Sketch Night. Damn.
March 12 - Thursday
Violet confronted the orange cat outside. B Gangsta got a really close look.... (photos)
March13 - Friday
Awake at 4:30 in the morning because of my teeth - but I discovered that they were just 'short' because they were being pushed up into my skull.
` Then I watched the sun rise. It was cool. I didn't get any pictures of it, but I did get a couple of Violet in the neighbor's yard staring at the birds (but not knowing what to do).
March 14 - Saturday
It's been rough today, and I don't want to talk about it. But there has been good news:
With a seafood sandwich from Subway in my hand, I returned home after getting my Jetta an oil change - only 30 bucks because it was customer appreciation day, so I could save my coupon! - and Lou and Brad were hanging out also eating Subway. But Lou was covered in fake blood stains! (photos!)
` They were telling me and Johnny how, in filming more of Liberation with Nils Osmar, that Gangster got to shoot at someone with not just one but two guns before being shot in the neck, which exploded. Then, with his face disguised via a gas mask, he drowned poor Lou Ryan in a sink of icewater in an unheated room, where he had to pretend to be dead on a freezing cold concrete floor!
` I know he's resistant to that stuff - Former-Director Nate got some good footage of him doing Sanchin barefoot in a blizzard, also completely bald and shirtless. Even so, Lou had to huddle around a stage light in order to maintain his composure.
Also, they got a veggie sandwich for me. I got to eat half of it later.
March 15 - Sunday
Snowed for a while. I spent a while honing my pep talk skills. Does anyone recall that a long time ago, I was with this Phil guy (who I never had a physical relationship with), and I started my Mad Scientist blog when I was in the process of moving the hell away from him?
` I no longer feel guilty for doing that. Who cares if he got me a ring before I could tell him I needed out? Best of all, I feel even more relived for never having had sex with him.
` Turns out that he's been rather controlling and cold towards his mom, who has many problems, among them being overworked both at school and work. Also, the property's gone to hell and she has no way of fixing anything because of really disabling arthritis, not to mention a severely ingrown toenail that grows back, which she tears out every month herself with a pair of pliers!
` This year she was also not able to remove the snow from a greenhouse during one blizzard and it caved in!
` Worst of all, a faithful worker over the past few years refused to help with this, saying it's "women's work", and the only person who ever made her laugh has gone off to Europe and hasn't answered his phone and got irritated at her because he interpreted something she said as kind of weird because she didn't say it right because she was on pain meds for her arthritis.
Yes, for the past few years, Phil has been disrespectful to his own mother, who shielded him from his abusive, maniacal, gun-slinging psychotic father, often taking the blame for things he did. And yet, Phil doesn't seem to quite believe this, and when he goes back home for a visit he spends most of his time at his dad's!
` When he got married, he even invited his mom's worst enemies - the even crazier parents of his dad who used to try to kill Phil when he was a baby - to the wedding even though they proposed to make a scene to embarrass Phil's mom!
` Wow, I'm gladder than ever that I got out of there. He gets some of that stuff from EdgeWalker, who's a smart guy, but is sometimes overbearing, and has apparently turned the both of them into intellectual snobs.
Also, I practiced the scene with Patience in the studio room in Ranier building. We even did it backwards once, and were fairly successful! Also struck up a conversation. She was also abused as a kid, but apparently it's less funny, and so bad that her dad got caught and she was adopted. She also lives near us.
March 17 - Tuesday
It's late, I'm at the gym. Violet ran out the door after dark, so I hope she comes back before we go to bed. Me and Brad got $120 worth of groceries at Grocery Outlet for $60! (Wow, everything really is more or less half off!)
March 18 - Wednesday
I got a hundred percent on my poster project. Other presentations included Irish Dance (NOT Riverdance!) and Philippine Tinikling Dance, which involves jumping in between pieces of bamboo that are being clapped together really loudly.
` Right now I'm watching some people push a car down the street near the gym. The crane is also up really high today!
March 19 - Thursday
This morning, we dropped my Wolfsburg off at the VW dealer's to check out why it's making a loud rattling noise. Then, onto school! (We saw Mike at the bus stop along the way, dressed as usual in his long coat and Fedora.)The performance went well. It's Scene 2 from Wonder of the World. Bev laughed all crazy like usual - other people laughed too - when I pulled the blanket off the 'barrel' in my lap to reveal a milk crate with a large drawing of a barrel on it!
Friday (20) - Tuesday (23)
Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. Bastard warranty won't cover the repairs for my Jetta, which have been needed since I first got the car from the Chevy dealership. I knew those bastards would get me somehow. Worst part is, I need $234 just to get my car back from the Volkswagen folks, instead of the expected $100.
` Zzzzzzz. I've been sick, but at least it's not a sinus infection this time.
Also, on Monday, I called Phil's mom, who said that Phil actually appreciated the confrontation and did more work for her that week than he had in the past five years. Wow!
March 24 - Tuesday
I went off to the gym in Lou Ryan's truck, not having my car back yet, with the intention of working out and then driving John home, as he doesn't have a car right now. Except... I couldn't figure out how to unstick the clutch when coming up the hill!
` Lou Ryan wasn't answering his phone, but luckily a cop happened by so I flagged him down and he pushed me into the turnout with his bumper bar thingy. Best thing was, Lou Ryan and B Gangsta could see the whole thing happen!
` Only then did Lou tell me about the trick to keeping the transmission from getting stuck.
March 25 - Wednesday
Beautiful sunny day, of which I spent 4 hours getting disability tested. Disturbing amounts of Jones Pure Cane Cola in the house. Lots of cheap/free food for us. Hooray!
` Finally got my car back. There was a note on the door from Crazy Landlady. Apparently she's going to let us resume work on the house in two days. Quick! Everyone take pictures of the wiring before she has a chance to cover it up!
` God! I was asleep the entire time they were gone, now they're back and bugging me while I'm on the computer. But at least I got this done! Onto the gym! And then I'll drive John home, as he doesn't have a car - but I do because we got my car back from getting it looked at and the warranty not covering anything.
` At least I got my car back, and I know what's wrong with it!
Friday, February 20, 2009
Continuing on with the life and times of... Dr. Nociceptor!
Once more I have some notebook scribblings for you, and as before, I promise to add my badass photos and 'interesing-ify' them as soon as I am able to sit down and spend the time, and then add more text explaining the photos.
` On with the scribblings... until the next Tuesday!
Oh my dog, I've been prison-raped in the mouth! Or something. And when I came home from school, there were brownies and a superhero (that'd be Lou Ryan) whose advances I couldn't resist. I feel so spoiled sometimes!
And then, it was fetch with Violet the Cat of Doom whilst Vada was busy being trapped in the garage-construction zone, probably feeling dejected. Serves her right for sneaking in there to begin with!
I took a long nap and tried to study once everyone but Johnny was asleep, but was quite distracted by all the hammering of him finishing his room up.
` The Grand Finale was a Skil Saw at 2:30 in the morning, right under our bedroom, waking Lou Ryan up, though at least his room is lookin' good - it may be the best one in this godawful house!
At last!! After nine years, and I've finally completed my State Quarter Collection! At the car wash today, I found the last two, Alaska and Hawaii, thanks to that five dollar bill I earned driving A Band Member to the jam shed!
However, just before retiring to bed, I noticed that the sliding glass door was open. I went out there and called out. Something moved. The Humoctopus, perhaps? And then, I saw two huge, glowing yellow eyes bounding towards me like a rabid kangaroo.
` Of course, it was just my long-legged cat creature, Vada. They had been out there, in the rain. Violet came through the gap in the fence, following her sister.
There's been plenty of screaming at the Crazy Landlady and construction noise this long morning before school, not terribly conducive to studying for my test.
` After the test, I was so hungry... that I'm now writing this at Pavé! Yummy muffin! Said "hi" to Cheshire Human's mother's lover, who owns the place.
` As far as the test went, I think I got everything right except the short answers (24 pts) and essay (20). Darn!
Wow! Way to go, Lou Ryan! He got Crazy Landlady to cooperate and help him finish the house! WHOOOO! (Somehow, however, I don't think this will last long.)
And now... we're listening to old recordings of his music from college 12 years ago. I must say, he's improved quite a bit.
I've also spent much time in the backyard ripping out English ivy and playing with the cat creatures. They are such good little predatory, bloodthirsty angels, climbing up on the roof to fetch a stick and all, and they'll even walk back through the holes in fence when I ask them to!
` Violet's also getting much better at climbing the grapevine trellis-thing, which seems to have become her own personal treehouse!
This morning's been a little more than hectic, and at the end of it all I had to fill my rear left tire, as I do every morning. Because my tires suck. (Or rather, they blow air out. And are bald.)
` However, I had to call Lou to tell me where the damn compressor attachment was in the mess that is the basement - it wasn't, it was on the dining room table - and then I had to fight my way out of this mess!
(There's a picture of it, see....)
Misty morning as usual. (Photo.) I'm now hanging out with Harlan and Frank, both who would prison rape me, and by prison rape, I mean some other amorphous concept.
Now I'm in the locker room at the gym, just after having discovered that I'd forgot my gym shorts. I also had to call Lou Ryan just now, but I had to use the gym phone because mine was out of service and yet his wasn't, even though we're on the same plan and I paid my piece of the bill already!
` However, I could barely hear him, not having any way to turn up the volume on the phone, and about the only thing I could make out was the word "Yes" after I asked him if my shorts were on the table.
So, when I got home from the gym and noticed that my tire was a bit flat, so I had a flash of insight: "Why not fill it up now so I don't have to worry about it later?"... thus ruining Lou's first perfect take with the rental mike which is due back at six, because I turned on the compressor right below where he was recording, which I didn't know because I couldn't hear him over the phone.
After that, I drove B Gangsta to work, but then we found that he had been 'terminated' at will. He asked why and his boss said that there was no reason! It broke his heart. He'd worked there for seventeen months!
To tell the truth, we were expecting this because the asshole kitchen manager (the one who once caught the oven mitts on fire) and his bitchy girlfriend gave Gangsta nothing but grief, even pulling costly maneuvers such as pretending the customers had rejected his food just to make him cook more.
` They have been doing this kind of thing for some time, and the Gangsta's boss apparently decided that these conflicts have been going on for long enough and... well... since he's the one lower on the totem pole, he was the one to be let go.
` In retaliation to this situation, we immediately headed down to Buzz Inn corporate headquarters and he applied there instead!
And as for Lou Ryan, he finally got three good tracks with the microphone before giving it back. But... there's always something. You see, he had told the Crazy Landlady about the cold tap on the shower not working, and, since our other three showers are not operational, it needs to be fixed, and that any day is good except for Tuesday because he's recording.
` Later on, she informed him that Tuesday was his only chance to ever have showers (or baths for that matter), saying "It has to be Tuesday or I won't fix at all!"
` So, she came over, illegal immigrant in tow, and it was hectic for Lou's recording because he had to make sure she didn't snoop through the house and all that.
So, when I finally got to the gym, John was putting together a new ab machine that one can work on their humping technique, and it was sitting right in the middle of the floor!
` It looks so perverse I love it, and I love using it! So did Adam, and he loved me using it too I'm sure! And it was also kinda hot watching him on it....
Anyway, the cold tap works now, but as for the hot water, most of it still pours out of the bathtub-thingy when you're taking a shower, thus scalding your feet, but you only get about five minutes of shower time before it gets cold. It really sucks!
Also, the illegal immigrant - most likely - has stolen Lou's own giant framing hammer! Like, WTF, dude?
Oh, and of course I also just had to forget, once more, to get toilet paper since my routine of going to the gym and all was messed up and I have now resorted to wiping my ass with... well, never mind.
` Apparently, I'm the only one in the house who ever notices when we're out of T.P. For days. Which kind of makes me feel concerned....
This morning, as you can see (photo!!), the light dusting of snow was most inviting to Violet, however, Vada could not be found. Not even in the garage.
` It amused me that Johnny kept finding Violet and proclaiming that Vada had been found, since he couldn't tell her apart from Violet.
And as for the Gangster's job, well, after Lou Ryan talked to his boss, to vouch for him, it was revealed that he'll probably be re-hired as soon as the asshole is fired.
` In the meantime, Gangster can file for unemployment right away because he signed his own termination slip. Which was apparently part of the plan.
Hey! It turns out that Vada really was in the garage, but, as usual, was making sure she didn't get found.
After the Character Interviews in Drama class, Cadet Cory (in one of his jumpsuits) and Tyler whatsisface were plugging a gig they do at Pike Place Market, by way of a demonstration of that Sounds, Speaking, Silence improv thing.
` I... well... let me just say that Tyler played a travel agent, the 'straight man' (though not so heterosexual in the end) Corey had fun as a delinquent customer, using the Sound Effects side of the stage as a bathroom, whereupon he would pull down the back of his jumpsuit and pretend to have extremely nasty diarrhea.
` You don't really want to know.
Then, in order to attend my Humanities class, I just stayed in my chair and the class came to me! Thom Lee and Kamil Hamaoui, both former instructors of mine, did an awesome number, and even Lolly the page-turner got a huge round of applause.
I'm writing now at the gym, on the elliptical. I have probably never mentioned it before, but I've done this quite a few times.
` I was thinking about how, after Googling B Gangsta's workplace for him, because he can't do it himself apparently, then I went to practice lines, so I turned off the fish tank filter and the doorbell rang and it was this guy to be recording with Lou Ryan, and so Gangsta plays his music for him, and I was lying on the couch feeling like I couldn't get away from the noise.
` Like my ears were being... prison raped!
There's a lot of that going on, apparently.
It seems my schedular is not safe for me to rely on. Practically everything I've written has had to be erased and replaced with what I did do in the end. Seriously. Every single square is erased, except for the morning coffee part. (Unless there's no coffee, in which case all squares are erased.)
` I don't know what I'm supposed to do about this. I mean, when Lou says for me to stop telling other people to be quiet because they have lives too, well, what about me?
It's like they take it for granted that I'll sacrifice my time for them, and they don't even say 'thanks'. I am so behind on homework it isn't funny.
Once again I find myself in a familiar cycle, taking care of myself by hiding in the corner in order to pull myself together enough to do homework. However, I don't often manage to pull myself together so my huddling in the corner looks like I'm just being lazy, which I have been called before when in this type of distress.
It's like I keep being so frazzled that I miss my chance.
Now I'm home, and OMG, talk about a lack of sound insulation - there's a HOLE IN MY OFFICE WALL!!! RIGHT THROUGH THE DAMN WALL, so it's now directly connected with the studio, where much noisy activity occurs.
Apparently, during the recording session, Lou and whoever else needed to get the cord for the headphones in.
They also needed room in my office for the drums, so they moved all my stuff, which I had left in mid-organization. DAMMIT!
` Not only that, but there's a cinder block full of dirt and ants on my floor, which they apparently needed to hold up the microphone. Great.
You see why I have trouble using this room? It's just not safe.
Also, despite the fact that Lou Ryan said that today (recording day) was the only day Crazy Landlady couldn't come over to fix the shower, she said that she couldn't fix it any other day. And so, she came over with an illegal immigrant she picked up at the Home Depot parking lot, and thanks to the poor quality of work, she didn't really fix it right, and didn't get the sink working in the downstairs bathroom like she said she would.
` Also, she left both the front door and the garage door wide open, helping to make up for my short time outside this morning with the cats. You know, because they ran outside.
` Oh, and said immigrant (probably) stole Lucas' framing hammer!
` On with the scribblings... until the next Tuesday!
February 4, 2009, Wednesday
Oh my dog, I've been prison-raped in the mouth! Or something. And when I came home from school, there were brownies and a superhero (that'd be Lou Ryan) whose advances I couldn't resist. I feel so spoiled sometimes!
And then, it was fetch with Violet the Cat of Doom whilst Vada was busy being trapped in the garage-construction zone, probably feeling dejected. Serves her right for sneaking in there to begin with!
I took a long nap and tried to study once everyone but Johnny was asleep, but was quite distracted by all the hammering of him finishing his room up.
` The Grand Finale was a Skil Saw at 2:30 in the morning, right under our bedroom, waking Lou Ryan up, though at least his room is lookin' good - it may be the best one in this godawful house!
February 5, 2009 Thursday
At last!! After nine years, and I've finally completed my State Quarter Collection! At the car wash today, I found the last two, Alaska and Hawaii, thanks to that five dollar bill I earned driving A Band Member to the jam shed!
However, just before retiring to bed, I noticed that the sliding glass door was open. I went out there and called out. Something moved. The Humoctopus, perhaps? And then, I saw two huge, glowing yellow eyes bounding towards me like a rabid kangaroo.
` Of course, it was just my long-legged cat creature, Vada. They had been out there, in the rain. Violet came through the gap in the fence, following her sister.
February 6, Friday
There's been plenty of screaming at the Crazy Landlady and construction noise this long morning before school, not terribly conducive to studying for my test.
` After the test, I was so hungry... that I'm now writing this at Pavé! Yummy muffin! Said "hi" to Cheshire Human's mother's lover, who owns the place.
` As far as the test went, I think I got everything right except the short answers (24 pts) and essay (20). Darn!
February 7, 2009, Saturday
Wow! Way to go, Lou Ryan! He got Crazy Landlady to cooperate and help him finish the house! WHOOOO! (Somehow, however, I don't think this will last long.)
And now... we're listening to old recordings of his music from college 12 years ago. I must say, he's improved quite a bit.
I've also spent much time in the backyard ripping out English ivy and playing with the cat creatures. They are such good little predatory, bloodthirsty angels, climbing up on the roof to fetch a stick and all, and they'll even walk back through the holes in fence when I ask them to!
` Violet's also getting much better at climbing the grapevine trellis-thing, which seems to have become her own personal treehouse!
February 8, 2009, Sunday
This morning's been a little more than hectic, and at the end of it all I had to fill my rear left tire, as I do every morning. Because my tires suck. (Or rather, they blow air out. And are bald.)
` However, I had to call Lou to tell me where the damn compressor attachment was in the mess that is the basement - it wasn't, it was on the dining room table - and then I had to fight my way out of this mess!
(There's a picture of it, see....)
February 9, 2009, Monday
Misty morning as usual. (Photo.) I'm now hanging out with Harlan and Frank, both who would prison rape me, and by prison rape, I mean some other amorphous concept.
Now I'm in the locker room at the gym, just after having discovered that I'd forgot my gym shorts. I also had to call Lou Ryan just now, but I had to use the gym phone because mine was out of service and yet his wasn't, even though we're on the same plan and I paid my piece of the bill already!
` However, I could barely hear him, not having any way to turn up the volume on the phone, and about the only thing I could make out was the word "Yes" after I asked him if my shorts were on the table.
So, when I got home from the gym and noticed that my tire was a bit flat, so I had a flash of insight: "Why not fill it up now so I don't have to worry about it later?"... thus ruining Lou's first perfect take with the rental mike which is due back at six, because I turned on the compressor right below where he was recording, which I didn't know because I couldn't hear him over the phone.
After that, I drove B Gangsta to work, but then we found that he had been 'terminated' at will. He asked why and his boss said that there was no reason! It broke his heart. He'd worked there for seventeen months!
To tell the truth, we were expecting this because the asshole kitchen manager (the one who once caught the oven mitts on fire) and his bitchy girlfriend gave Gangsta nothing but grief, even pulling costly maneuvers such as pretending the customers had rejected his food just to make him cook more.
` They have been doing this kind of thing for some time, and the Gangsta's boss apparently decided that these conflicts have been going on for long enough and... well... since he's the one lower on the totem pole, he was the one to be let go.
` In retaliation to this situation, we immediately headed down to Buzz Inn corporate headquarters and he applied there instead!
And as for Lou Ryan, he finally got three good tracks with the microphone before giving it back. But... there's always something. You see, he had told the Crazy Landlady about the cold tap on the shower not working, and, since our other three showers are not operational, it needs to be fixed, and that any day is good except for Tuesday because he's recording.
` Later on, she informed him that Tuesday was his only chance to ever have showers (or baths for that matter), saying "It has to be Tuesday or I won't fix at all!"
` So, she came over, illegal immigrant in tow, and it was hectic for Lou's recording because he had to make sure she didn't snoop through the house and all that.
So, when I finally got to the gym, John was putting together a new ab machine that one can work on their humping technique, and it was sitting right in the middle of the floor!
` It looks so perverse I love it, and I love using it! So did Adam, and he loved me using it too I'm sure! And it was also kinda hot watching him on it....
Anyway, the cold tap works now, but as for the hot water, most of it still pours out of the bathtub-thingy when you're taking a shower, thus scalding your feet, but you only get about five minutes of shower time before it gets cold. It really sucks!
Also, the illegal immigrant - most likely - has stolen Lou's own giant framing hammer! Like, WTF, dude?
Oh, and of course I also just had to forget, once more, to get toilet paper since my routine of going to the gym and all was messed up and I have now resorted to wiping my ass with... well, never mind.
` Apparently, I'm the only one in the house who ever notices when we're out of T.P. For days. Which kind of makes me feel concerned....
February 10, 2009, Tuesday
This morning, as you can see (photo!!), the light dusting of snow was most inviting to Violet, however, Vada could not be found. Not even in the garage.
` It amused me that Johnny kept finding Violet and proclaiming that Vada had been found, since he couldn't tell her apart from Violet.
And as for the Gangster's job, well, after Lou Ryan talked to his boss, to vouch for him, it was revealed that he'll probably be re-hired as soon as the asshole is fired.
` In the meantime, Gangster can file for unemployment right away because he signed his own termination slip. Which was apparently part of the plan.
Hey! It turns out that Vada really was in the garage, but, as usual, was making sure she didn't get found.
After the Character Interviews in Drama class, Cadet Cory (in one of his jumpsuits) and Tyler whatsisface were plugging a gig they do at Pike Place Market, by way of a demonstration of that Sounds, Speaking, Silence improv thing.
` I... well... let me just say that Tyler played a travel agent, the 'straight man' (though not so heterosexual in the end) Corey had fun as a delinquent customer, using the Sound Effects side of the stage as a bathroom, whereupon he would pull down the back of his jumpsuit and pretend to have extremely nasty diarrhea.
` You don't really want to know.
Then, in order to attend my Humanities class, I just stayed in my chair and the class came to me! Thom Lee and Kamil Hamaoui, both former instructors of mine, did an awesome number, and even Lolly the page-turner got a huge round of applause.
I'm writing now at the gym, on the elliptical. I have probably never mentioned it before, but I've done this quite a few times.
` I was thinking about how, after Googling B Gangsta's workplace for him, because he can't do it himself apparently, then I went to practice lines, so I turned off the fish tank filter and the doorbell rang and it was this guy to be recording with Lou Ryan, and so Gangsta plays his music for him, and I was lying on the couch feeling like I couldn't get away from the noise.
` Like my ears were being... prison raped!
There's a lot of that going on, apparently.
It seems my schedular is not safe for me to rely on. Practically everything I've written has had to be erased and replaced with what I did do in the end. Seriously. Every single square is erased, except for the morning coffee part. (Unless there's no coffee, in which case all squares are erased.)
` I don't know what I'm supposed to do about this. I mean, when Lou says for me to stop telling other people to be quiet because they have lives too, well, what about me?
It's like they take it for granted that I'll sacrifice my time for them, and they don't even say 'thanks'. I am so behind on homework it isn't funny.
Once again I find myself in a familiar cycle, taking care of myself by hiding in the corner in order to pull myself together enough to do homework. However, I don't often manage to pull myself together so my huddling in the corner looks like I'm just being lazy, which I have been called before when in this type of distress.
It's like I keep being so frazzled that I miss my chance.
Now I'm home, and OMG, talk about a lack of sound insulation - there's a HOLE IN MY OFFICE WALL!!! RIGHT THROUGH THE DAMN WALL, so it's now directly connected with the studio, where much noisy activity occurs.
Apparently, during the recording session, Lou and whoever else needed to get the cord for the headphones in.
They also needed room in my office for the drums, so they moved all my stuff, which I had left in mid-organization. DAMMIT!
` Not only that, but there's a cinder block full of dirt and ants on my floor, which they apparently needed to hold up the microphone. Great.
You see why I have trouble using this room? It's just not safe.
Also, despite the fact that Lou Ryan said that today (recording day) was the only day Crazy Landlady couldn't come over to fix the shower, she said that she couldn't fix it any other day. And so, she came over with an illegal immigrant she picked up at the Home Depot parking lot, and thanks to the poor quality of work, she didn't really fix it right, and didn't get the sink working in the downstairs bathroom like she said she would.
` Also, she left both the front door and the garage door wide open, helping to make up for my short time outside this morning with the cats. You know, because they ran outside.
` Oh, and said immigrant (probably) stole Lucas' framing hammer!
...To be continued!
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