The Tedium...

Previously, I've written the titles, authors and descriptions of various books on little index cards, for my own evil purposes of keeping track... evilly! (Not surprisingly, this began during the Time Of No Computer, or TONC, as it is known among my tortured creations.)

I have so many cards that, before I add any more to my collection, I've decided to write them all down in my computer so that I can just consult the list to make sure I don't already have the card, rather than go through the trouble of flipping through this huge stack!

This is but one of the many massive undertakings I have been doing in order to further my evil science writing purposes, but why am I telling you about this one? Because -- you can see the results!


Abducted (How People Come to Believe...) -* Susan Clancy
Absinthe & Flamethrowers -- William Gurstelle
(The) Age of Wonder -- Richard Holmes
Aladdin's Lamp -- John Freely
Almost Everyone's Guide to Science *- John Gribbin
Amber -- Andrew Ross
Among the Great Apes -- Paul Raffaele
Antimatter -- Frank Close
Archimedes to Hawking -- Clifford Pickover
Are Universes Thicker Than Blackberries? *- Martin Gardner
Autonomous Robots -- George A Bekey

Before the Big Bang -- Brian Clegg
Beneath the Metropolis -- Alex Marshall
Beyond Human -- Benford & Malartre
Beyond UFOS -- Jeffrey Bennett
Big Fish -- Richard Ellis
(The) Bigger Bang *- James E Lidsey
Big Ideas -- Ira Flatow (narrator)
(The) Bizarre and Incredible World of Plants -- Stuppy, Kesseler & Harley
(The) Black Hole War -- Leonard Susskind
(The) Book of Nothing *-John D Barrow
(The) Book of Vice -- Peter Sagal
(The) Borderlands of Science *- Michael Shermer
Born Digital -- Palfrey & Gasser
(The) Botany of Desire -- Michael Pollan
Boxen -- C S Lewis
(The) Brain That Changes Itself -- Norman Doridge
Brains That Work a little bit differently *- Bragdon & Gamon
Breaking the Spell -- Daniel C Dennett
But is it Science? -- Pennock & Ruse
Buyology -- Martin Lindstrom

(The) Canon -- Natalie Angier
(The) Carbon Age -- Eric Roston
Catching Fire -- Richard Wrangham
Cat's Paws and Catapults *- Steven Vogel
Cave Canem -- Lorna Robinson
Censoring Science -- Mark Bowen
Charles Darwin's On The Origin of Species -- Illustrated by Fuller & Keller
Chases and Escapes -- Paul J Nahin
Children of Prometheus *- Christopher Wills
Circumference -- Nicholas Nicastro
(The) Coming Convergence -- Stanley Schmidt
(The) Complete Ice Age -- Brian M Fagan
Complexity -- Melanie Mitchell
Condemned Knowledge -- ?not found
Consciousness (an Introduction) *- Susan Blackmore
Consciousness (a user's guide) *- Adam Zeman
Corrupted Science *- John Grant
Cosmic Jackpot -- Paul Davies
(The) Counter-Creationism Handbook -- Mark Isaak
Counterknowledge -- Damian Thompson
Crashing Through -- Robert Kurson
(The) Crime of Reason -- Robert B Laughlin
Cro-Magnon -- Brian Fagan
(The) Crowded Universe -- Alan Boss
Cruisin' the Fossil Freeway -- Johnson & Troll
Cyclopedia Anatomicae -- Gyorgy Feher

Darwinian Detectives -- Norman A Johnson
Darwinian Dynamics *- Richard E Michod
(The) Day We Found The Universe -- Marcia Bartusiak
Death By Black Holes -- Neil DeGrasse Tyson
Death From The Skies! -- Phil Plait
Deep Brain Stimulation -- Jamie Talan
De La Metrie's Ghost -- Chris Nunn
Denialism -* Michael Specter
(The) Department of Mad Scientists -- Michael Belfiore
(The) Devious Book for Cats -- Ginsberg & Sherman
Did Time Begin? Will Time End? -- Paul Frampton
Digital Soul *- Thomas M Georges
Discarded Science *- John Grant
Distory -- Robert Schnakenberg
(The) Dragons of Eden *- Carl Sagan
Drawing the Line * Steven M Wise
Dread -- Philip Alcabes
(The) Drunkard's Walk -* Leonard Mlodinow

(The) Earth Moves -- Dan Hofstadter
Eating the Sun -- Oliver Morton
(The) Edge of Physics -- Anil Ananthaswamy
Ecology *- Eugene P Odum
(The) Ego Tunnel -- Thomas Metzinger
Einstein's Mistakes -- Hans Ohanian
Einstein's Telescope -- Evalyn Gates
Einstein's Universe *- A. Zee
(The) Elephant's Secret Sense -- Caitlin O'Connel
(The) Elegant Universe *- Brian Greene
Embracing the Wide Sky -- Daniel Tammet
(The) Emotion Machine -- Marvin Minsky
(The) Emporer of Scent *- Chandler Burr
Endless Forms Most Beautiful *- Sean Carroll
(The) Ethical Brain -- Michael Gazzaniga
Eureka Man -- Alan Hirshfeld
Ever Since Darwin *- Stephen Jay Gould
Every Living Thing -- Rob Dunn
Evidence of Evolution -- Mary Ellen Hannibal
Evolution *- Carl Zimmer
Evolutionary Medicine -- Trevathan & McKenna
Evolution for Everyone -- David Sloan Wilson
Evolution vs Creationism -- Eugenie Scott
Exercises for the Whole Brain *- Bragdon & Fellows
Exploring Consciousness *- Rita Carter

(The) Faith Instinct -- Nicholas Wade
(The) Faith of Scientists -- Nancy K Frankenberry
Faux Real -- Robert Kanigel
Feeding the Fire -- Mark E Eberhart
(The) Feeling of What Happens *- Antonio Damasio
Finding Our Tongues -- Dean Falk
(The) First Word *- Christine Keneally
Fixing My Gaze -- Susan R Barry
Flat Earth -- Christine Garwood
Forbidden Knowledge -- Roger Shattuck
(The) Formation of the Solar System -- Michael Woolfson
Fossil Legends of the First Americans -* Adrienne Mayor
From Eternity to Here -- Sean Carroll
From Genesis to Genetics *- John A Moore
(The) Fundamental Constants -- Harald Fritzsch
(The) Future of the Brain *- Steven Rose

(The) The Geek's Guide to Word Domination -- Garth Sundem
Genesis -- Robert M Hazen
(The) Genius Engine -- Kathleen Stein
(The) Genius of China -- Robert Temple
Geologica -- Robert R Coenroads
Giant Molecules -- Walter Gratzer
Glut -- Alex Wright
Godel, Escher, Bach *-Douglas R Hofstadter
Good Germs, Bad Germs -- Jessica Snyder Sachs
(The) Great Betrayal *- Horace Freeland Judson
(The) Greatest Science Stories Never Told -- Rick Beyer
(The) Greatest Show on Earth *- Richard Dawkins

(The) Hazards of Space Travel -- Neil F Comins
Head Cases -- Michael Paul Mason
Heaven's Touch -- James B Kaler
Hen's Teeth and Horse's Toes *- Stephen Jay Gould
Heroes, Rogues and Lovers *- Dabbs & Dabbs
(The) Hidden Brain -- Shankar Vedantam
Hidden Evidence (2nd ed.) -- David Owen
(The) History of Astronomy -- Couper & Henbest
Hollywood Science -- Sidney Perkowitz
Hope For Animals And Their World -- Jane Goodall
How Brains Make Up Their Minds *- Walter J Freeman
How Does One Cut a Triangle (2nd ed) -- Alexander Soifer
How It Ends -- Chris Impey
How Language Works *- David Crystal
How Math Can Save Your Life -- James D Stein
How Mathematicians Think -- William Byers
How Mathematics Happened -- Peter S Rudman
How Physics Confronts Reality -- Roger Newton
How the Mind Works *- Steven Pinker
How to Build a Mind *- Igor Aleksander
How to Defeat Your Own Clone -- Kurpinski & Johnson
How to Live on Mars -- Robert Zubrin
How to Solve It -- G Polya
How We Decide -- Jonah Lehrer
How We Live and Why We Die -- Lewis Wolpert
Human -- Michael S Gazzaniga
Human Biology (6th ed.) -- Daniel Chiras
(The) Human Brain Book -- Parker, Aldridge, Carter
(The) Human Career -- Richard G Klein
Human Origins -- De Salle & Tattersall
(The) Hungry Scientist Handbook -- Buckley & Binns

I Am A Strange Loop -- Douglas Hofstadter
Ig Nobel Prizes -- Marc Abrahams
Imagined Worlds *- Freeman Dyson
Impossible? -- Julian Havil
(An) Incomplete Education (revised) -- Jones & Wilson
(The) Infinite Gift -- Charles Yang
In the Beat of a Heart *- John Whitfield
In Search of Deep Time *- Henry Gee
Inside the Animal Mind * George Page
Intelligent Design Creationism and its Critics *- Robert T Pennock
Intelligent Thought *- John Brockman
Inverted Bowl -- George H A Cole
(The) Invisible Kingdom -- Idan Ben-Barak
Irreligion -- John Allen Paulos
It Looked Good on Paper -- Bill Fawcett
It Takes a Genome -- Greg Gibson

(The) Joy of Physics -- Arthur Wiggins

Kaleidoscope Sky -- Tim Herd
(The) Kingdom of Infinite Space -- Raymond Tallis
Kluge -- Gary Marcus
Knowing the Nature of Physical Law -- Michael Munowitz

(The) Language Instinct *- Steven Pinker
(The) Legacy of the Mastodon -- Keith Thomson
Lewis Carroll in Numberland -- Robin Wilson
Liars, Lovers and Heroes *- Quartz & Sejnowski
Liasons of Life *- Tom Wakeford
Lies, Damned Lies and Science -- Sherry Seethaler
Life Ascending -- Nick Lane
(The) Lightness of Being -- Frank Wilczek
(The) Little Book of Pandemics -- Peter Moore
Lives of the Planets -- Richard Corfield
(The) Living Cosmos -- Chris Impey
Logicomix -- Papadimitriou, Papaditos, Donna, Doxiadis
Loneliness -- William Patrick
Long For This World -- Jonathan Weiner
(The) Long Thaw -- David Archer
Lost Christianities -- Bart Ehrman
(The) Lucifer Effect *- Philip Zimbardo

(The) Magnetic Universe -- J B Zirker
(The) Making of the Fittest *- Sean B Carroll
(The) Making of Intelligence *- Ken Richardson
Mannhatta -- Eric W Sanderson
Many Skies *- Arthur Upgren
Mathematics and Common Sense -- Philip J Davis
Mendel in the Kitchen -- Fedroff & Brown
Mental Floss -- Magazine, books and games!
Milestones of Civilization -- Blandford & Davidson
(The) Mind and the Brain *- Schwartz & Begley
Mindless Eating -- Brian Wansink
(The) Mind of the Market -- Michael Shermer
(The) Mind's Past *- Michael Gazzaniga
Mind Wide Open *- Steven Johnson
Mirroring People -- Marco Iacoboni
Misquoting Jesus -- Bart Ehrman
(The) Misunderstood Gene *- Michael Morange
(The) Monty Hall Problem -- Jason Rosenhouse
(The) Moon -- Michael Carlowicz
More Than Genes -- Dan Agin
(The) Mother Tongue *- Bill Bryson
Multiplicity Yours -- Hwa A Lim
(The) Museum of Hoaxes *- Alex Boese
Musicophilia -- Oliver Sacks
My Stroke of Insight -- Jill Bolte Taylor
Mythematics -- Michael Huber

Nanosciences -- Joachim & Plevert
(A) Natural History of Seeing -* Simon Ings
Nature Loves to Hide *- Shimon Malin
(The) Nature of Space and Time -- Hawking & Penrose
(The) Nature of Technology -- W Brian Arthur
Nature's Blueprint *- Dan Hooper
Negative Math -- Alberto A Martinez
(The) Neuro Revolution -- Zack Lynch
(The) Neuroscience of Fair Play -- Donald W Pfaff
Never Shower in a Thunderstorm -- Anahad O'Connor
(The) New Atheism -- Victor Stenger
(The) New Encyclopedia of Unbelief -- Tom Flynn
New Theories of Everything -- John D Barrow
(The) New Time Travelers -- David Toomey
(The) New Worlds -- Casdi & Encrenaz
(The) Nine Numbers of the Cosmos *- Michael Rowan-Robinson
(The) Noble Lie -- Gary Greenberg
No Plot? No Problem! -* Chris Baty
Number Freaking -- Gary Rimmer

(100) One Hundred Most Important Science Ideas -- Henderson, Crilly & Baker
One Hundred Essential Things You Didn't Know You Didn't Know -- John D Barrow
Only A Theory -- Kenneth Miller
On Writing -- Stephen King
Origamics -- Kazuo Haga
(The) Origin of Species *- Charles Darwin (eds. 1 and 6)
(The) Other Brain -- R Douglas Fields
Out of Thin Air -- Peter Ward
(The) Oxford Dictionary of World Histories -- Glynnis Chantrell

Pain *- Patrick Wall
(The) Panda's Thumb *- Stephen Jay Gould
Particle or Wave -- Charis Anastopoulos
(The) Pea and the Sun -- Leonard Wapner
(The) Pedant's Revolt -- Andrea Barham
People And The Sky -- Anthony Aveni
(The) Perfect Swarm -- Len Fisher
Physical Geography -- McKnight & Hess
Physics of the Impossible -- Michio Kaku
(The) Plausibility of Life *- Kirschner & Gerhart
(The) Pleasure Instinct -- Gene Wallenstein
Poisons -- Peter Macinnis
(The) Political Mind -- George Lakoff
(The) Politics of Jesus -- Obery Hendricks Jr
(The) Portable Atheist -- Christopher Hitchens
(A) Portrait of the Brain -- Adam Zemen
(The) Power Makers -- Maury Klein
(The) Power of Critical Thinking -- Lewis Vaughn
Predictably Irrational -- Dan Ariely
Prehistoric Life -- editors of Dorling Kindersley
(The) Primate Family Tree -- Ian Redmond
Prime Mover *- Steven Vogel
Principles of Toxicology -- Stine & Brown
Probably Not -- Lawrence N Dworsky
Programming the Universe -- Seth Lloyd

Q Is For Quantum *- John Gribbin
Quantum Leaps in the Wrong Direction ** Wynn & Wiggins
(The) Quantum Zoo -- Marcus Chown

Reading in the Brain -- Stanislas Dehaene
Reinventing Gravity *- John W Moffat
Reinventing the Sacred -- Stuart A Kauffman
Relics of Eden -- Daniel J Fairbanks
Remarkable Creatures -- Sean B Carroll
(The) Republican War on Science -* Chris Mooney
(The) Richness of Life -- Gould & Rose
Riddled With Life -- Marlene Zuk
Rock, Paper, Scissors -- Len Fisher
Robots Unlimited -- David Levy
(The) Runaway Universe *- Donald Goldsmith

Science and Nonbelief -- Taner Edis
Science at the Edge -- John Brockman
(The) Science of Fear -- Daniel Gardner
(The) Science of Liberty -- Timothy Ferris
Science Friction *- Michael Shermer
(The) Science of Aliens *- Clifford Pickover
(The) Science of Good & Evil *- Michael Shermer
Scientists and Scoundrels -- Robert Silverberg
(The) Score -- Faye Flam
(The) Secret Pulse of Time -- Stefan Klein
See What I'm Saying -- Lawrence D Rosenblum
Sensory Exotica *- Howard C Hughes
Seventy Great Mysteries of the Natural World -- Michael Benton
Sexing the Brain *- Lesley Rodgers
Sex, Sleep, Eat, Drink, Dream -- Jennifer Ackerman
Sexy Orchids Make Lousy Lovers -- Marty Crump
Six Degrees -- Mark Lynas
Skeptics and True Believers *- Chet Raymo
(The) Skeptic's Guide to the Paranormal *- Lynne Kelly
Slam-dunks and No-Brainers -- Leslie Susan
(The) Smartest Animals on the Planet -- Sally Boysen
Snake Oil Science -- R Barker Bausell
Sneakiest Uses For Everyday Things -- Cy Tymony
Spycraft -- Wallace, Melton, Schlessinger
Stem Cell Research -- Joseph Panno
Still Life -- Melissa Milgrom
Strange Matters *- Tom Siegfried
Strickberger's Evolution -- Hall & Hallgrimsson
(A) Stubbornly Persistent Illusion -- Stephen Hawking
(The) Stuff of Life -- Zander & Cannon
(The) Stuff of Thought -- Steven Pinker
Stumbling on Happiness *- Daniel Gilbert
Sudden Origins *- Jeffrey Schwartz
Sun in a Bottle -- Charles Seife
Supernatural Selection -* Matt J Rossano
(The) Superorganism -- Holldobler & EO Wilson
Superstition -- Robert L Park
Surfing Through Hypserspace *- Clifford A Pickover

Tales From the Underground *- David Wolfe
Talk to the Hand -- Lynne Truss
(A) Tear at the Edge of Creation -- Marcelo Glesier
(The) Ten Most Beautiful Experiments -- George Johnson
(The 10,000) Ten Thousand Year Explosion -- Cochran & Harpending
Terra -- Michael Novacek
That Book of Perfectly Useless Information (This/The Other Book) -- Mitchell Symons
(The) Thermodynamic Universe -- BG Sidharth
Think Smart -- Richard Restak
(The) Third Domain -- Tim Friend
(13) Thirteen Things That Don't Make Sense -- Michael Brooks
This Book Warps Space And Time -- Norman Sperling
This Will Change Everything -- John Brockman
Three Steps to the Universe *- Garfinkle & Garfinkle
(The) Three-Pound Enigma -- Shannon Moffett
Thumbs, Toes and Tears -- Chip Walter
Time (A Traveler's Guide) *- Clifford A Pickover
Time, Space, Stars & Man -- Michael M Woolfson
(The) Time Paradox -- Zimbardo & Boyd
Time Travel in Einstein's Universe *- J Richard Gott
Tinkering With Eden *- Kim Todd
Total Recall -- Bell & Gemmell
Treating the Brain -- Walter G Bradley
(The) Triple Helix *- Richard Lewontin
(The) Triumph of Evolution *- Niles Eldredge
(The) True Believer -- Eric Hoffer

(The) Undergrowth of Science *- Walter Gratzer
(The) Undiscovered Mind *- John Horgan
(The) Unfolding of Language *- Guy Deutcher
Unintelligent Design *- Mark Perakh
(The) Universe Before The Big Bang -- Maurizio Gasperini
Up From Dragons *- Skoyles & Dorion Sagan
Upgrade Me -- Brian Clegg
Uncertainty -- David Lindley
(The) Universe -- Carlos I Calle
Unscientific America -- Kirshenbaum, Mooney
(A) User's Guide to the Universe -- Goldberg & Blomquist

(The) Varieties of Scientific Experience -- Carl Sagan
Voices From The Moon -- Andrew Chaikin
Voodoo Science *- Robert Park

Wandering Stars -- George HA Cole
(The) Way We Think *- Fauconnier & Turner
Weather -- Randy Cerveny
Weed 'em and Reap -- Roger Welsch
Weird Water & Fuzzy Logic *- Martin Gardner
Welcome to Your Brain -- Aamodt & Wang
What Are You Optimistic About? -- John Brockman
What Does a Martian Look Like? *- Cohen & Stewart
What Does it Mean to Be Human? -- Potts & Sloan
What if the Earth Had Two Moons? -- Neil Comins
What Makes You Tick? *- Thomas B Gerner
What's Next -- Buckingham & Ward
When Science Goes Wrong -- Simon Le Vay
When You Were a Tadpole And I Was A Fish -- Martin Gardner
(The) Whole Story *- Toby Murcott
Whose Bible is it? -- Jaroslav Pelikan
Why Choose This Book? -- Read Montague
Why Darwin Matters *- Michael Shermer
Why Does E=mc2? -- Cox & Forshaw
Why Elephants Have Big Ears *- Chris Lavers
Why Evolution is True -- Jerry Coyne
Why Most Things Fail -- Paul Ormerod
Why People Believe Weird Things *- Michael Shermer
Why Science? -- James Trefil
Why We Feel *- Victor S Johnston
Why We Make Mistakes -- Joseph T Hallinan
Wicked Plants -- Stewart
Wild Minds * Marc D Hauser
Wisdom -- Stephen S Hall
Word Myths *-David Wilton
Words and Rules *- Steven Pinker
(The) World in Six Songs -- Daniel Levitin
(A) World Without Ice -- Henry N Pollack
(The) World Without Us -- Alan Weisman

(The) X in Sex *- David Bainbridge

Y (The Descent of Men) *- Steven Jones
You Are Here -- Christopher Potter
You Are Not a Gadget -- Jaron Lanier
Your Brain on Food -- Gary L Wenk
Your Flying Car Awaits -- Paul Milo
Your Inner Fish -- Neil Shubin
You Say To-ma-to -- RW Jackson


Yes, all these books, from questionable to top-notch quality, I have written a card for each one over a very long period of time -- then, I typed up the titles in just under four hours!
` Alas, there are many more cards to write, and many more to read... but for now, it's time for bed. I have a long day ahead of me, which will probably consist of more tedium.

What I would do for just one minion!

The Spanish Spongebobs: ¡Traducir los Bob Esponjas es muy divertido!

Believe it or not, this 'stupid video post' actually does have something to do with what I'm learning in college. I'm almost done with fall quarter, and am about to have the time to share my more serious articles, and even other schoolwork.
` But, for now, I thought, just to update this blog if nothing else, something of a less serious nature.

You see, October 19, 2010 was the best day ever of my life, because I had just gone through a childhood developmental stage attained by most people at 2 1/2 years old, thus acquiring some more efficient brain-processing skills. Unfortunately, my life quickly went downhill for other reasons despite this (i.e. I got the flu, my favorite cat died, etc).
` On the best day ever, however, I remembered having seen on YouTube the title, 'Spongebob Squarepants -- The Best Day Ever', so I found the 'sing-along' version on YouTube, which featured such strange sights as Spongebob with an oversized butt flying through the water, leaving behind a rainbow trail.

'Dare I speculate?' I thought, having never actually seen the show.

However, in the sidebar, I noticed another title, 'Bob Esponja -- El Mejor de Los Dias'! This Bob Esponja sounded eerily similar to Spongebob, but it was in Spanish-Spanish, that is, the kind of Spanish spoken in Spain. (The most noticeable feature is the pronunciation of 'c' and 'z' as a 'th' sound.)
` This one wasn't a sing-along video, it only had still pictures, and also the song was different because it only consisted of the first verse and then had a bunch of dialogue.
` I thought it might be fun to try to translate the dialogue, but it would help if I could see what was going on. It would also help if I had the Spanish lyrics, but when I looked them up online, they did not match the ones I'd heard!

And then, I found out why:

I was going around YouTube, looking for a version that shows the original video and came across a completely different translation of exactly the same song, in a different key, as sung by a much different-sounding Bob Esponja -- this one with a Latin American accent!

I later looked this up on Wikipedia -- sure enough, there are both a Spanish and a Latin American version of Bob Esponja! I don't know why that is, but it is.

The first thing that popped into my head was, 'Great! Now I can listen to both and compare the two and from that, figure out what they're saying!' You know, kind of like the idea behind deciphering the Rosetta stone, but with Bob Esponjas.

Amazingly, I managed, with the power of listening intently, to figure out that he was talking to his pet snail, who I knew was like a cat, about the new generation of Crab-burgers, fishing for jellyfish with Patricio (whom at least I knew must be the sea star, Patrick), having a karate session with 'Arenita', whom I figured must be the squirrel in the diving suit, and then going to the clarinet recital of 'Calamardo' whom I figured must be a squid.

That's seriously all I knew. I felt lost in this pursuit, however, so I decided to go around YouTube, watching videos, and was able to confirm that much of this made sense. As for the show, I didn't know quite what to make of it.
` And then, I saw the chocolate-selling scene with the dried-up old lady! "You just can't wait for me to die, can you?" It was wrong on so many levels...



Hooray for lying! This, of course, convinced me to start viewing the show on Netflix, which we had just subscribed to at the time. Importantly, I decided to use my newfound mental skills to analyze it as TV shows are meant to be analyzed!

I liked the way the characters play off one another, especially the way that Spongebob and Patrick so greatly annoy the sarcastic Squidward (Calamardo) the bald, middle-aged, self-absorbed, curmudgeonly octopus (i.e. not actually a squid) who fancies himself to be an artistic genius trapped in a dead-end job, and who secretly wants to join in their silly games because they're so happy, despite being innocent and lacking in intelligence, while he's not.
` I also quickly figured out that the stupidity seen in the show is not the punchline -- it's the way they make fun of the stupidity. The inappropriate wholesomeness reminded me of the very twisted Strangers With Candy series (about a graying former prostitute back in high school), whereas the parts with fast-paced flashbacks reminded me of Family Guy, and then the weird tangential stuff was reminiscent of Monty Python. Other parts were... well... more special. In a short bus sort of way.

My mental health will never be the same.

Anyway, the show did help me translate what was going on in the songs. And do you want to know what I came up with? Well, I think I did fairly well, considering I'm only in Spanish Level 2 and haven't even formally learned the future tense. Of course, my instructor also helped me, but still, I got most of it by myself, even parts she couldn't understand!

So, I'll present the Spanish-from-Spain translation first, along with the Latin American Spanish version, so you can actually listen, if you dare:



Ya ha salido el sol sólo para mí
The sun has come up just for me
?? Qué día va a ser tengo que salir
What a day it's going to be, I have to go out
Saltar al fin de felicidad
To jump, at last, for joy
Es lo que tu descubrirás
It is what you will discover,
!Todos es especialo! (!Este ya!)
Everything is special (This already!)

¡Ey, Gary!
Hi, Gary!
?Mrao?
Mrao?
Te preguntarás por que es el mejor dia a mi vida?
You would ask why it's the best day of my life?
Porque, Gary, voy a ?? este maravilloso día trayendo al mundo a toda
Because, Gary, I'm going to ?begin this marvelous day bringing to the whole world
una nueva generación de deliciosas ?burgers Cangreburgers!
a new generation of delicious ?burgers Krabby Patties

Seguida ?? una vigorizante sesión de karate con Arenita al mediodía,
It continues ?with an invigorating session of karate with Sandy at noon,
Y una tarde de caza de medusas con Patrício donde estrena mi
And an afternoon of catching? jellyfish with Patrick where he'll first use my
poseción más prefiere y nueva ¡El caze medusa profesionál de lujo!
most preferred and new posession; the profesional deluxe jellyfish hunter!

Y por el gran final, ¡todos mis amigos más intimos
And for the grand finale, all my best friends
nos reuniremos para el recital la clarinete de Calimardo!
(we) will come together for Squidward's clarinet recital!

¡Estoy tan emocionado que creo que voy a explotarrrr!
I'm so excited that I think that I'm going to explode!

¡Todos es especialooo! (¡Este ya!)
Everything is special-o! (This already!)


I don't know what 'especialo' means, but whatever -- if any Spanish-speaker would like to comment on my translations, it'd be great.
` Oh yes, that's right -- translations-plural!: If that wasn't enough for you, here's the Latin American version, which is slower and easier to understand, and thus a huge help in translating the Spanish-Spanish version:



El sol ha salido y me ha sonreído
The sun has come up and has smiled at me
Que sería buen día me ha prometido
What a good day it will be, promised to me!
Salté de la cama con mucha alegría
Jumped out of bed with much happiness
Sintiéndome cómo nunca y
I'm feeling like never before, and
¡El mejor día es! (Best day ever!)
It's the best day! (Best day ever!)

!Hola, Gary!
Hello, Gary!
?Mrao?
Mrao?
?Preguntas por que es mejor dia?
You ask why it's the best day?
Porque Gary, comenzaré este maravilloso día dando vida a
Because, Gary, this marvelous day will begin giving life to
una nueva generación de deliciosas Cangreburgers!
a new generation of delicious Krabby Patties!

Seguida por una vigorosa sessión de karate con Arenita
It continues for a vigorous session of karate with Sandy
Y una tarde pescando medusas con Patricio donde revelaré
And an afternoon jellyfishing with Patrick where I'll reveal
mi más ?presciente preciosada posesión; el atrapa-medusas de lujo profesional
My most ?prescient precious posession; the deluxe professional jellyfish trap!

Y para el gran final, iré con mis mejores amigos
And for the grand finale, I'll go with my best friends
a presenciniar recital de clarineta de Calamardo
to be present at Squidward's clarinet recital!

Estoy tan emocionado yo creo que voy a explotaaar!
I'm so excited I think I'm going to explode!

El mejor dia eeeessss! (Best day ever!)
It's the best day ever!


And right when I was putting my paper together, I happened to go on YouTube (yes, for research purposes!) and I actually found the English version of this song, with the same dialogue -- it's actually just the beginning of an episode.
` Unfortunately, it was taken down the day after, but while it lasted, I wrote down what's in the original video:

Mister Sun came up and he smiled at me!
(The sun actually comes through his window with a -- ARRRGH! -- hideously cute smile!)
Said, It's gonna be a good one, just wait and see!
(Awkward pause where Spongebob and the sun stare at each other, then then Spongebob's bed GOES UP IN FLAMES, and Spongebob escapes the creepy underwater sun's fire just in time, and goes running around on the outside of his pineapple house.)
Jumped out of bed, and I ran outside, feeling so extra-ecstatified!
It's the best day ever! (Best day ever!)

(Spongebob find his pet snail on the roof and says,) "Hey, Gary!"
(Gary says,) "Mrao?"
(We can see what Spongebob is thinking via the magic of thought balloons.) "Why is it the best day ever, you ask? Because, Gary, I get to start this wonderful day bringing life to a whole new generation of delicious Krabby Patties! Followed by a vigorous midday session of karate with Sandy! And an afternoon jellyfishing with Patrick, where I'll unveil my newest, most prized posession, the Deluxe Jellyslayer Composite Pro!" (Spongebob demonstrates its capturing powers on Gary.)
"And, for the grand finale, every one of my closest friends joining together for Squidward's clarinet recital! I am so excited I think I'm going to explode!" (Gary backs away for safety purposes.)

Spongebob explodes and keeps singing, "It's the best day everrr!" while dorking it up along his way to work, and he is in such a good mood that he fails to notice that his workplace is covered in yellow tape that says 'Condemned' and giggles like a moron when he puts his hand on the doorknob.
` The video ends before we see his reaction -- well, I wanna see the rest! Better order some more Spongebob!

While the good-quality English language version of that video is down, I at least found a bad quality Latin American Spanish version of it... at least you can see what I was talking about.



Anyway, translating this all was indeed one of my Spanish projects this quarter. I hope it was... uh... special enough for you.

And if you think this was a horrible idea for a post, just remember that part of the reason I like Spongebob is because I went to Retard School and I have a tendency to love laughing at retards.

In any case, I have my Spanish class to blame!

Yeah, I'm blaming it on my education!

Hey... wait a second!

I just remembered, I left out one of my favorite characters. He's into world domination, like me -- it's Plankton, the one-eyed copepod! He also has an A.I., his computer wife, Karen, and a secret lab at the Chum Bucket, a restaurant nobody goes to because the food is that bad!
` Unfortunately, most of the Spongebob clips on YouTube are really not worth watching, so this was the best I could do:

Here's what happens when Plankton tries to be buddies with Spongebob -- of course, he's actually after Mr. Krabs' secret Krabby Patty recipe... but what they don't know is that Mr. Krabs is watching!

F is for Fire that burns down the whole town,
U is for Uranium bombs,
N is for No survivors...



Spongebob is such a moron, it hurts, and it hurts so much that I have that tingly sensation... no, it shouldn't stop!

Uhhhh....

This reminds me, I'll need to be getting back into gear for world domination soon. Be expecting that.

And, as a reward for making it all the way down to the bottom, I also found a video that reminds me of the Good Ol' (not really) Ghetto Days. Here's three short episodes of what Spongebob Squarepants would be like if all the characters came from the crackhouse I used to live at!

Are you ready, stoners? Ooooohhhhh... (cough! cough!) hold on, 'kay? Oooooohhhh, who lives in a bong in a dormitory?
SpongeBong HempPants
Disgusting and green and sticky is he....



Yes, for real!

I'm so sorry if this post is lame. Which it isn't. But if it were lame, I would apologize.

Ahhhh, I'm feeling more like myself now!

Well, I must be on my way. Finally, I'll have a real post next. But which one? There are so many to choose from by now....

Funniest. Scathing. Video. Ever.

` This is thanks to hilarious oddball Morgetron, whose blog is full of Tres Bizarrity. Normally I don't deal with politics here, but at the moment, this blog is the only one even slightly in need of an update.
` Great rationale, huh? I'm sure by now that most people in this country are so sick and tired of the disaster that is the Bush presidency that I figure it's safe to put a video up here, just for laughs.
` And when I say 'laughs', well, Lou Ryan and B-Dizzle just about suffocated from laughter and Lou demanded to know the URL of the video so he could email it to a bunch of people. I mention this because I don't think he's ever reacted that way to a video before!
` So please, laugh away!



` Oh yeah, and this goes with it, if you want to know more about what the hell they're talking about. I hope it should be obvious by now....

What fun - Bibliographies!

In case anyone is wondering what kinds of things I've been doing to stop myself from blogging, I shall exhibit an example in all its glory (sans formatted features such as italics and margins, 'cause they disappeared when I cut and pasted this):


Fowler, W.S. (1947) Stone Eating Utensils of Prehistoric New England American Antiquity, 13(2), 146-163.


An ancient culture of New England was quite industrious in its quarrying of soapstone and shaping it into bowls, cooking pots, plates, dishes, platters, ladles and cups. The article also describes in detail which stone tools were used for creating these pieces, and those include chisels, picks, axes, scrapers and polishers, which were made via percussion (or 'banging,' in technical jargon). This kind of stone-working eventually seems to have gone out of usage some time after easier-to-make clay vessels became more popular. Of course, I cannot say whether or not this hypothesis is well-supported - the article is quite dated and describes the stone tools "as an important industrial development between savagery and the advanced cultural stage of protohistoric times." Priceless.



Huteson, P.R. (2006). Feasts and Festivals. In H.J. Birx (Ed.), Encyclopedia of anthropology (pp. 951-955). Thousand Oaks, CA. Sage.


Feasting originates far back in history, perhaps before the 'ancient stone-age' (Paleolithic) peoples. For one thing, it is a very efficient way of utilizing food when there is a sudden overabundance and few options for preserving it. Elaborate rituals are also associated with feasts, including connecting oneself with the animal species being consumed, honoring one's ancestors, and making offerings. As feasts evolved over time, they became festivals, usually involving more than one feast, such as the Inupiats' "traditional trading fair."



Jones, M. (2007) Feast: Why Humans Share Food Oxford University Press [Whoops - forgot to mention the chapter and page numbers!]


Cave excavations show that Homo neanderthalensis shared hearths, shelters and food, which isn't very surprising. Hominins have apparently made hearths for perhaps 200,000 years, and probably made use of fire even before that. Cooking tends to improve the flavor of meat, kill pathogens and soften it so that those with few or no teeth can more easily consume it. Cooking also breaks down toxins in plants, and reduces the number of calories needed to digest some foods - a pre-digestion, if you will. Thus, cooking may help explain our ancestors' drastic reduction in tooth size, gut size and increase in brain size (as brains require disproportionately large amounts of calories for their weight).



Rietz, C.A. The History of Eating Utensils. Retrieved April 12, 2008, from
http://research.calacademy.org/research/anthropology/utensil/index.html


This web page describes the eating utensils found in the Rietz Collection of Food Technology, collected in the mid-20th century and housed at the Department of Anthropology at the California Academy of Sciences. There are nearly 1,400 objects from all over the world - Africa, Asia, the Mediterranean, Colonial America and Europe - made from a wide variety of materials including metals, glass, bone, ivory, plant fibers, horn and leather. The items on the website include various kinds of forks, knives (including pocket knives), spoons, chopsticks, and portable versions of these utensils.



Robert, W. (2008, 34, 1) Eating Insects. Alternatives Journal, 8-10. Retrieved April 10, 2008, from ProQuest database.


Eighty percent of human beings eat insects - they have always been popular. All over the world, grubs, grasshoppers, ants, locusts, beetles and termites are standard fare, snack food, or even enjoyed as delicacies! That's a good thing - insects generally contain as much protein as livestock and poultry and contain higher levels of iron, zinc, niacin, thiamine and riboflavin, as well as essential fatty acids. Eating insects just makes sense - they are more plentiful than other animals and can be sustainably fed and harvested; the 'cultivation' of insects can protect the environment and endangered species.



Wiley, A.S. (2003). Geophagy. In S.H. Katz, & W.W. Weaver (EJS.) Encyclopedia of food and culture: Vol.2 (pp. 120-212). New York: Thomson Gale.


Various species of birds, reptiles and mammals - including humans - have been well-known for eating earth, particularly clay. But what for? Clays have a very large surface area to mass ratio, and are capable of absorbing toxic chemicals, exchanging minerals, and protecting the gastrointestinal tract. Ungulates seem to do this in order to derive minerals such as calcium and magnesium, while parrots are known to use clays to protect their innards from a diet of somewhat toxic seeds. Clay is also commonly eaten by pregnant women of some cultures, and by some Native Americans when mixed in with bitter acorn meal and baked into bread.



I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did (which was marginal).... it got me a 41.2 out of 50!

Starting Something New for the New Year

` For the past few weeks I've been doing solar masses of non-internet-related activities - including festivities, quelling emotional drainage, school, errand-filled days, etc - but I thought I would come forth with an idea I've had since early December....

` Ready for this? It's audacious! It's informative! It's the Corrigendopedia! You know how I loathe misperceptions? This website puts them in their place! And in a really interesting way, different from any other.
` I won't have it up for some time, but I thought that instead of stealing lakes and silly things like that (which I'm too tired to do anyway), I would write more of my 'think again!' articles here, which will not only provide blog content but will be added to the website and later published when I have a large enough collection.
` Here's the introduction:

Learning new things is one of my foremost passions. And when one learns new things, one must often unlearn a number of previously-held assumptions which contradict the new knowledge.

As a critically thinking person, I cannot help but notice that the culture surrounding me propagates many misperceptions about the world, a small but prevalent example being the assumption that the direction water spirals down the drain is affected by what side of the equator it is on.

As I've noted in my entry for the Coriolis Effect, this force does determine the cyclical direction of storms and water currents, but it is virtually negligible when it comes to plumbing; its effect on less-than gargantuan scales can only be glimpsed in carefully controlled laboratory conditions.

You can challenge this myth in real life: If you watch water drain from a sink a few times, it will probably swirl one way just as often as it does the other. However, a flushing toilet flows either clockwise, counterclockwise, or straight back, and this is determined by the angle of the spouts near the rim of the bowl.

However, it is possible that if this is the first time you've heard this revelation, you may yet forget it in the future! Why? Because; I repeated the myth first and corrected it afterward, placing the myth most prominently in one's awareness.

A month from now, which would you remember? The well-ingrained myth that you've heard a hundred times, or that one instance in which you've seen it dispelled (assuming this is the case)? Will you forget it or not?

I've known this general principal for some time, though just prior to this writing I found an interesting article which really exemplifies it. (Shankar Vedantam, Difficulty in Debunking Myths Rooted in the Way the Mind Works, Washington Post, 2007.) It starts out with the description of a psychological experiment:

Norbert Schwarz, a University of Michigan social psychologist, had some volunteers read a flyer issued by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. This flyer repeated many commonly held views about the flu vaccine and labeled which ones were actually true and which ones were common misconceptions.

Thirty minutes later, the older volunteers incorrectly remembered the 'trueness' or 'falseness' of about 28 percent of the statements, as did younger volunteers after three days. Also at three days, the older individuals misremembered about 40% of the statements!

The unsettling thing about this is not just that the volunteers wound up with misconceptions about which statements were true and which were false, but that they believed all of the information (both correct and incorrect) originated from the Center of Disease Control!

That didn't shock me, considering the well-established fact that conscious memories are basically reconstituted from a surprisingly sketchy recording in your brain, resulting in a picture of what you think happened, or what you think you learned. It could be relatively accurate to begin with, but over time you may forget some details and your brain may 'flesh out' the sketch differently - thus your memory changes without your being aware.

This is why people get into arguments over the details of what happened, say, last Wednesday, or what they did on a road trip or sometimes, even, what they learned in physics class! Interesting indeed, and you can rest assured that I have more to say on the subject.

Schwarz's study, which has since been confirmed in peer-reviewed laboratory experiments, shows that reciting a myth to someone - even for the purpose of dispelling it - makes that myth more memorable in the person's mind! If they cannot remember the correction as clearly as the myth, they're more likely to believe the myth is true.

And so, the very fact that many myths are challenged may actually help them to stay around. In addition, according to research by Kimberlee Weaver at Virginia Polytechnic and others, in one's mental perception, a message heard often enough can seem to have been repeated too many times to have come from only one source.

Thus, the sheer number of repeats can mentally 'overflow' from the original source and be perceived as coming from other, independent sources. So if an untrustworthy source says one thing over and over, you might get the sense that you've heard the same thing elsewhere, giving the impression of believability.

Plus, research by cognitive social scientist Ruth Mayo of Hebrew University found that after two things are shown not to be associated, repeating the names of both
things close together in time still create the feeling that they are connected. If I say; "Bill was shown not to have stolen the car," you feel that Bill is associated with stealing cars, don't you?

So, what if you don't say anything at all? According to a recent study by University of Southern California organizational psychologist Peter Kim, when you don't challenge an assertion, the silence is taken as confirmation. I'm not surprised!

The whole point to this is that it can be difficult to ensure you're getting correct information across to someone else if they are also exposed to contrary information.

So you may wonder; what authority do I have to go around shelling out correct information in the first place? That's an excellent question. First of all, I have a deep understanding of what science is and why it is important, and though this knowledge is not common, my aim is to change that.

My education largely consists of college, speaking with professors, my vast collection of science books, as well as periodicals and news from science journal websites to keep me up to date. And, as a general rule, I double-check anything I put forth as being 'true'.

Subjects of utmost interest to me involve most prominently a) biology and b) areas of psychology dealing with conscious awareness, people's perceptions, and the propagation of myths. I am committed to objectivity, accuracy and making sure the point gets through. Though the last one is probably the trickiest of all three, I love a good challenge.

Shall we?

` What do you think, guys? A website that's a better source of information than this blog? It can be done! (No, it's not a New Year's Resolution; I want it to happen!)